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On Today's Episode:

When was the last time you got into an argument? Have you been avoiding certain groups of people because the environment is so toxic? Have you caught yourself wondering after a conversation if you, in fact, were the one being difficult with someone else? While each scenario is different, the solution is nearly the same, and it requires you to show up as your best self even when it’s difficult. We can’t control other people’s emotions and responses but we are in control of our own. Leading with kindness when you encounter difficult people is the best way to ensure that you have meaningful relationships and conversations with others. You’re not always going to agree, but you can disagree and seek to understand where you may be wrong to make sure you have the healthiest relationships with family, friends, and teammates.

SHOW NOTES:

0:00 | Introduction
1:34 | Toxicity In the Family
8:12 | Aggressive People In Denial
13:15 | Can’t Accept They’re Wrong
17:41 | Steel Man the Argument
23:16 | Dealing With Obnoxious People
26:32 | Know If You’re Being Difficult
29:00 | Keep Arguments Grounded
33:49 | Give People Space To Process
36:07 | Ending Difficulty for Harmony

QUOTES:

“It is okay for people to have a negative opinion about you.” [3:16]

“Anything that stops you from seeing yourself clearly, is something that holds you back. It stops you from having that progress, it stops you from building a life of joy, and at the end of the day, living a joyful life is really the sum total” [4:59]

“The very thing that makes people attack you is an outward focused gaze, and those that focus outward fail to see the opportunities in themselves.” [6:30]

“If the other person is getting agitated, instead of pretending that they're not, in the most gentle, loving, reconciliatory way, we're trying to figure out what happened.” [12:06]

“This comes back to wanting to be able to understand wanting to be able to articulate their side not trying to force them into meeting admitting that they're wrong,” [20:01]

“Kindness is the higher value than pointing out every flaw that we see or every bit of obnoxious behavior. Because at some point, it just spirals into madness” [24:00]

“Difficult isn't about, I'm setting out to be a jerk. Something has triggered an insecurity in me, and now I'm not at my best.” [27:39]

“We all think the other person is being difficult, when in reality, there's probably something that we could have done differently, to have that exchange go in a completely different direction” [28:12]

“When we can both explain each other's sides, we can defuse that situation, we can stop the scope creep of the argument, we can keep things just to the facts.” [33:13]

“Oftentimes people speak not so that they can be understood, but so that they can understand.” [33:49]

“When you point them thumbs back at yourself and look at what you can do, the world gets a whole lot better.” [37:59]

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