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The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament

This could all be B.S.

The Church of What's Happening Now: The New Testament

Joey Coco Diaz

Tv & Film, Comedy

4.818.8K Ratings

🗓️ 5 May 2026

⏱️ 87 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Joey Diaz updates the world on his knee replacement, advice he would give to his 30 and 40 year old self, what works better than the pain pills, running people over in GTA and much more! 

SHOW NOTES
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Transcript

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0:00.0

Kick this motherfucker, Neil Lee.

0:05.0

What out, beautiful people.

0:06.8

It's the church of what's happening now.

0:09.3

New edition, whatever, New Testament.

0:12.2

I got my man Lee Syatt, the Cato of Jews,

0:15.5

your uncle Joey, back for another fun-filled episode.

0:19.2

It's Tuesday.

0:20.4

Cinco de Mayo. Ta-da-da-da-da-da-da- episode. It's Tuesday, Cinco de Mayo.

0:22.4

Nobody gives a fuck anymore.

0:26.5

You ever know, that's that?

0:27.6

Like, you gave a fuck one year because you had a crush on a girl that worked at the

0:31.5

thing and you were going to show up and dance to Mambo.

0:34.9

But besides that, unless you got nothing right and who gives a fuck? I think it's because you don't drink. I think people who drink are like, oh, fuck. I drive around and I look. They don't fucking celebrate it like they used it. No, that's true. I don't know because I was in L.A. I don't know what it was. I mean, Cinco de Mayo in L.A. like was, we did the weed stuff for Cinco de Mayo, a lot of

0:57.0

dispensaries, did comedy shows, you know, it was Cinco to fucking Mayo in L.A. where they invented

1:03.9

Cinco de Mayo with the Mexicans right there. I don't even know, and I dated Mexican for five

1:08.5

years. Do Mexicans celebrate it or is like a white thing?

1:11.2

It's like Corona. Right. It's a Corona holiday. You know what I'm saying? It's the day the Mexicans beat the French up, correct? Something like that. I don't know. I have no idea. Fucking two college educated people. You see what's wrong with this country, ladies and gentlemen? As soon as we start recording, he said, single DiMaio, what's the sixth?

1:29.0

You want to fucking know that your child.

1:30.9

What did they get in? educated people. You see what's wrong with this country, ladies and gentlemen? As soon as we start recording, you said,

1:28.2

Cinco de Mayo,

1:29.0

what's the sixth? You want to fucking know

1:29.9

that your child,

...

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