They’re Doing What They Do

The Daily Dad

Daily Dad

Society & Culture, Dads, Relationships, Parenting, Self-improvement, Kids & Family, Ryan Holiday, Wisdom, Education, Fatherhood

4.8 • 602 Ratings

🗓️ 12 January 2024

⏱️ 2 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

The late Paul Woodruff told a wonderful story in his episode on the Daily Stoic podcast. Before he died, he loved birdwatching and had a bird feeder in his backyard. But the squirrels kept stealing the birdseed he was putting out. This was frustrating and annoying and he found himself growing angry.

But then he remembered a passage from Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations about how we should accept when things are doing what their nature demands. The squirrels were not trying to give Paul a hard time, they did not mean any harm. The squirrels were simply doing what they do. They were doing what their nature demanded.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.
0:15.3	I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom, and insights
0:23.3	from parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.
0:31.1	They're just doing what they do. They're loud, they're messy, they're expensive, they don't listen.
0:35.4	They're also kids, and it's sort of the point.
0:46.4	The late Paul Woodruff told a wonderful story in his episode of the Daily Stoic podcast before he died about this battle he got locked into with the squirrels in his backyard.
0:50.8	They kept stealing the bird seed he was putting out. This was frustrating and annoying.
0:54.7	Then he remembered a passage from Marcus Aurelius's meditations about how we should accept when things are doing what their nature demands. The squirrels weren't trying to give Paul
1:00.1	a hard time. They did not mean any harm. The squirrels were simply doing what they do. They were doing
1:04.4	what their nature demanded. And so how unfair is it that we get frustrated at our kids for being
1:08.9	kids? Babies have trouble sleeping.
1:15.7	They make a disgusting mess in their diapers. Teenagers push boundaries. Toddlers throw tantrums.
1:19.5	This is what they do. It's not a reflection of their character. It's not an act of aggression. It's not a reflection of our character either. It's something totally expected,
1:24.2	totally natural, totally endurable too, by the way. To be frustrated by this, to expect something different is nuts.
1:30.6	It's mean.
1:31.2	It's distracting you from the fact that squirrels are just as fun to watch in your backyard as birds.
1:36.2	At this moment you're in with your kids is just as much a part of growing up as any others.
1:56.2	Hey, you're listening to a Daily Dad podcast, one meditation a day inspired to help you do your most important job, which is be a great father.
1:59.4	These are meditations inspired by ancient wisdom,
2:03.0	psychological research, and just great strategies from normal dads just like you. Thanks for
2:09.7	listening.

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