There is nothing you could have done differently, emotional abuse would have happened anyway

Love and Abuse

Paul Colaianni

Mental Health, Lies, Emotional, Health & Fitness, Psychological, Society & Culture, Deception, Manipulation, Narcissism, Verbal, Abuse, Relationships

4.6 • 816 Ratings

🗓️ 10 April 2019

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Many emotional abuse victims believe they are at fault for the abuse, as if there is behavior they did to bring it on. The short answer is there is nothing you can do to prevent it. You can't prevent a personality characteristic that is going to appear no matter what. Love and Abuse is the official podcast of The M.E.A.N. Workbook on manipulation and emotional abuse at loveandabuse.com. #loveandabuse

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to Love and Abuse, the show about helping you identify poisonous communication and toxic behavior.
0:07.4	You deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.
0:10.9	That's why it's important that you learn to pinpoint manipulative and controlling behavior so that you keep your power and your sanity.
0:18.6	I'm your host, Paul Koliani.
0:30.9	Music power and your sanity. I'm your host, Paul Koliani. Welcome back to love and abuse.
0:33.1	And if this is your first time listening, welcome to love and abuse.
0:36.4	This is the show that will really help you understand that you are not the cause for any type of poisonous communication or toxic behavior that comes your way.
0:49.0	You're not.
0:50.7	You might have certain qualities and characteristics about you that abusers, poisonous people, toxic people can take advantage of.
1:01.8	And that usually involves generosity, kindness, caring, compassion, a lot of the good qualities that any one of us would like to have in our life
1:15.1	as far as knowing someone with those qualities.
1:19.4	As far as family, friends, romantic partners, coworkers, we want people to be kind, caring,
1:27.3	compassionate, generous. Those are good qualities to have.
1:32.4	And what ends up happening is that abusive or toxic or poisonous people will come along and see these
1:42.0	qualities and experience these qualities with us,
1:44.8	and because the rest of us are who we are,
1:48.3	we will get treatment that will seem excessively worse than most people.
1:56.5	And what that means is that because you are a kind and compassionate and caring person,
2:03.5	I'm assuming you are if you're listening to the show, or if you're not, you're learning about
2:07.8	yourself and maybe you are lacking some of these qualities.
2:11.3	It's still good to hear this stuff.
2:14.0	What happens is there's a complementary thing that goes on when you are with someone that is abusive.
	...

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