Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bailiff Jesse Thorn, where in Chambers

this week clearing the docket with me, the only judge that matters until you die Judge

John Hodgman. And possibly after you die, depending on your beliefs.

Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. I haven't stopped partying,

see, even though it's New Year's Day. I'm still singing all-blind Zion and meow,

meow, talk. Meow, meow, Jesse Thorn, what are your New Year's resolutions do you have,

Annie? Oh, wow. You know, I am not a big New Year's

resolver. I tend to, I live an unexamined life, John. Oh, no. My life is just a maelstrom

that I'm flopping through like the beginning of the Wizard of Oz. My plan is just

not to be a pair of stocking clad feet sticking out from underneath the house. And also

not to have your ruby slippers stolen from you. Oh, people are trying to steal my slips.

Well, that's for my New Year's resolutions, Jesse. Of course, I'm trying to pour less

poisonous Twitter into my eyes at three o'clock in the morning. You know, just try to take

care of my body, be more mindful, and naturally continue to try to learn how to make and

refine aluminum oxy nitride. What's that, John? Oh, sorry, I figured you would know. As

you know, November 1st of this year, 2020, that is just starting today. November 1st is

the 10th anniversary of the Judge John Hodgman podcast. Oh, wow. And of course, the two traditional

10th anniversary gifts are tin and less traditional, more modern aluminum. So I'm trying to learn

how to make aluminum oxy nitride. Well, you know, Jesse, what aluminum oxy nitride's main

property is, don't you? Transparency? Yes, it's transparent. It's a real life thing that I found

out about on Wikipedia today. Transparent aluminum from Star Trek 4 is a real thing. It's a real thing.

They figured out how to do it. It goes by the commercial name of Elon and they use it to make bulletproof

...