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The Angry Therapist Podcast

Therapy Thursdays | Anxious attachment, Exes & Relationship Myths

The Angry Therapist Podcast

John Kim

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.61.1K Ratings

🗓️ 21 May 2026

⏱️ 15 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this Therapy Thursdays episode, John answers listener questions about anxious attachment, exes, blame, perfectionism, makeup sex, and relationship myths. He explores how attachment patterns affect your partner, why we sometimes stay mentally connected to an ex, and how to know whether a relationship has real long-term potential. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship has legs, why you keep blaming your partner, or why you still think about someone from your past, this episode will help you slow down and look at the deeper patterns underneath. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Take this Holland and Barrett ad break to listen to your body.

0:03.0

Is your body after some energy support from Solgars magnesium citrate?

0:07.0

Or maybe it's after a kick of applied nutrition critical weight protein for leg day.

0:12.0

Is it looking to iron out tiredness with Vitobiotics Ferroglobin?

0:16.0

Or is your body simply saying,

0:18.0

You got to show me love.

0:20.0

Find the brands that help you back your body at Holland and Barrett.

0:23.9

Magnesium contributes to normal energy, yielding, metabolism,

0:26.2

protein contributes to the growth in maintenance and muscle mass,

0:28.2

iron contributes to reduction of tightness and fatigue.

0:30.3

Things you would never bring up in therapy,

0:33.0

you could bring up here.

0:47.3

How do you overcome perfectionism?

0:52.3

Here's an interesting way to look at perfectionism.

0:55.1

It's your way of hiding. If you at perfectionism, it's your way of hiding.

1:01.5

If you see perfectionism as the shield that you're hiding behind,

1:06.1

then you might say to yourself, okay, I don't want to hide anymore.

1:21.1

So I'm going to give myself permission to come out front to not be perfect, to show myself, to let people know that this is me and I'm okay with that.

1:23.6

Now, it's not just a one-time thing. It is a practice, right?

1:25.6

If you are a perfectionist and I know that it runs deep and it stems from a lot of things,

1:31.9

but ultimately, you being perfect is a way to hide, which is blocking your potential, your growth.

1:42.2

So if you tell yourself, if you make a promise to yourself that you're not going to hide anymore,

...

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