We must begin with the distinction between hope and charity because I have hope and very little charity. Hope is the theological virtue by which we desire the kingdom of Heaven and eternal life as our happiness, placing our trust in Christ’s promises and relying not on our own strength, but on the help of the Holy Spirit.

Hope is the desire for one’s own happiness. And since nothing in this world is perfect, lasting or enough, then our hope is the proper love of self that motivates us to do what we need to achieve perfect and lasting happiness through union with God and heaven.

Hope as the desire for happiness propels us to get rid of our vice and sin which destroys union with God, and practice virtue, spend time in prayer, receive the sacraments, learn what Jesus revealed through Scripture and Tradition and so on…so that we can reach union with God.

With hope I want my good, my happiness and so I stop doing the things that destroy happiness (sin) and I make a habit out of those things that bring lasting happiness. With hope I desire my own happiness.

Charity is the theological virtue by which we love God above all things for his own sake, and our neighbor as ourselves for the love of God. With hope I want my good, my happiness. Charity is based on wanting the good, the happiness of someone else.

With Hope I say, “I want my good.” With charity I say, “I want your good.” Italians have a beautiful way of saying I love you, they say “Ti voglio bene.” I want your good. In the theological virtue of charity, we are saying to God, I love you; I want your good; I want to do something to make you happy O Lord. I am good about desiring and striving after my own happiness. I am bad at charity. I rarely think of doing something just for the good or the happiness of God.

Since I don’t think about the love of God as much as I should maybe we should begin with basics. The first way we can love God is by keeping the commandments. Jesus said If you love me you will keep my commandments. John 14:15 But Jesus knows the 10 are just an outline of the complexity of life so he went on to say in the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5:21)

It is pretty easy to keep the broad strokes of the 10 Commandments. How are we doing on the finer points? Are we loving God when it comes to pride, envy, anger, sloth, greed, gluttony, lust, gossip, judgmental thoughts and words, what we consider small lies, drunkenness, pornography? If we want to be clear on how to love God, we should read paragraphs 2083-2557 of the CCC.

In 1 Cor 13:4 Paul gives us a good short list of what we should do to love God: Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous; love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offence and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.

You are God's chosen race, his saints; he loves you, and you should be clothed in sincere compassion, in kindness and humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with one another; forgive each other as soon as a quarrel begins. The Lord has forgiven you; now you must do the same. Over all these…, to keep them together and complete them, put on love. And may the peace of Christ reign in your hearts, because it is for this that you were called together as parts of one body. Always be thankful. (Galatians 3:12)