The Stories You Tell Yourself Define You as a Man | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
Order of Man
Ryan Michler
4.8 • 9K Ratings
🗓️ 24 January 2025
⏱️ 39 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this episode of Friday Field Notes, Ryan Michler dives into the powerful concept of the stories men tell themselves and how these narratives shape their identity, success, and outlook on life. Ryan challenges listeners to rewrite negative scripts, adopt a victor mindset, and use their inner dialogue to build resilience and purpose. He emphasizes the importance of self-talk, taking responsibility, and reframing experiences as opportunities for growth. This inspiring episode will leave you reflecting on your own story and the impact it has on who you are and who you’re becoming.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
00:00 Introduction
02:30 The impact of stories on identity
04:50 Reframing negative narratives
09:10 Self-talk and identity shaping
15:50 Victim vs. victor mindset
22:25 Lessons from the words we use
31:50 Changing old stories
36:25 Closing thoughts
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Never speak to yourself or about yourself in a way that is inconsistent with the way that you would speak with other people. |
| 0:06.7 | Would you ever call anybody that? You wouldn't do that, but you would do that about yourself. |
| 0:11.1 | So don't tell yourself that. And don't start to wrap up your identity in these negative behaviors. |
| 0:15.3 | Like, I'm a failure. You're not a failure. You may have failed. So my identity is not wrapped up in failure, but in the fact that I have failed, |
| 0:21.4 | and yet I continue to push forward and move forward and grow and develop and learn and get better. |
| 0:26.1 | If you're going to wrap up your identity in something, choose something that's going to be valuable for you. |
| 0:32.6 | You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly charge your own path. |
| 0:40.3 | When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time. |
| 0:44.3 | You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. |
| 0:49.3 | This is your life. This is who you are. |
| 0:52.3 | This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man. |
| 1:02.0 | There is no way that you could convince me that the stories that we tell ourselves about ourselves and about other people define who we are. |
| 1:10.0 | Unfortunately, most of the stories we tell |
| 1:13.1 | ourselves are not real. They're made up. Their stories, they're fabricated, their fiction. |
| 1:18.2 | We think they're real because we tend to support them with biased evidence that tells us |
| 1:25.1 | that we're right. Maybe those stories that we tell about ourselves |
| 1:28.7 | about how horrible we are or even maybe how good or successful we're destined to be have |
| 1:35.3 | been implanted in us from the time that we were little boys. Regardless, it's very, very |
| 1:41.0 | important that we learn and understand that the stories that we make up about |
| 1:44.8 | ourselves, about other people, and about the way this world operates, define our ability to be |
| 1:51.2 | successful, define us as men, define who we are and how we show up, and ultimately the results |
| 1:57.2 | that we produce. So I'm convinced that when you see a man who is hyper successful |
... |
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