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Leading Saints Podcast

The Silent Burdens of Men in Elders Quorum | An Interview with Joe Speredon

Leading Saints Podcast

Leading Saints

Religion & Spirituality, Christianity

4.81.2K Ratings

🗓️ 30 March 2024

⏱️ 50 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Hailing from the heart of Utah, Joe Speredon’s diverse background and experience led him into leadership within men’s work. Having embarked on his own path of crisis and self-discovery, Joe discovered the healing nature of brotherhood and masculine support. From that place he founded the Utah Men’s Circle and later the Algiz Guard. Working with Sacred Sons and many other influential leaders and groups, Joe has had the opportunity to travel all over the world, meet men from diverse backgrounds, and guide them through their own healing and evolution as a coach, leader and inspirational speaker. Joe currently serves in the Church as a Sunday School teacher and as a stake emergency preparedness specialist.

Joe Speredon

Links

UtahMensCircle.com Instagram: @utahmenscircle Facebook: Utah Men’s Circle AlgizGuard.com Instagram: @thealgizguard Facebook: The Algiz Guard The Intentional Father: A Practical Guide to Raise Sons of Courage and Character There is already a discussion started about this podcast. Share your thoughts here.

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Highlights

1:40 Introduction to Joe Speredon and his background 4:20 Joe shares why mens work is so important to him and how he got started in it. 6:00 Too many men are suffering in silence. However, when men open up they will find that they are suffering with the same things. 8:00 We have the engine (elders quorum) but we don’t know how to turn it on. We need men to be courageous enough to open up during elders quorum. 10:00 What is brotherhood? We’ve had a cultural shift that the cool thing is to be a lone wolf. Men think they have to do it all and do it alone. 14:30 The war that we fight is mostly against ourselves. The idea of brotherhood is it’s me against myself and having brothers to help us be the best version of ourselves. 15:30 How can an elders quorum president stimulate brotherhood in Sunday meetings?

  • Take off your own mask as the leader. Be open with your struggles.
  • Be the first to be vulnerable and authentic and others will follow.

17:30 Joe created the Utah Men’s Circle, a gathering twice a month for a couple hours, a time to check in and talk about how you are really feeling. 21:40 Have less formal gatherings and activities to connect and have conversations. 23:00 Doing men’s work outside of elders quorum. We need to create a place for active and inactive members to connect without preaching. 26:00 The vilification of men and toxic masculinity 30:30 Due to wounding and conditioning and because they are mortal, men can turn into:

  1. The sadist, meaning I’m going to hurt you before you hurt me
  2. The masochist, meaning I’m going to hurt me before you can hurt me

32:00 To become more realigned is more than just getting your behaviors in check. You have to know where you are going and why you are doing it. 33:50 An archetype that gets thrown around a lot and is related to toxic masculinity is “king”. We can have a reframing of the word king by doing self work. 36:40 As a society we have lost a lot of rights of passage for young men. We need to be giving young men opportunities to set up from boyhood to manhood. 40:10 Resources for fathers and men to find ways to step up and change. 42:10 Unrighteous dominion is another way to say toxic masculinity. What exactly is unrighteous dominion? 43:20 We are teaching young men that what you do is not so much the problem but it’s about how everyone else feels about what you are doing. Instead, we need to help them focus on WHY they did what they did. 47:40 Joe wasn’t called to do men’s circle or help men but he reminds us that we don’t have to be commanded in all things and we should be anxiously engaged in good causes.

The Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org.

Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 700 episodes.

Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

How do you help someone tell their spouse that they have secretly been viewing pornography?

0:07.0

Wow, these are tough situations.

0:10.0

Thankfully, one of my favorite and most effective therapists Jeff Struer put together a presentation about

0:15.4

disclosing betrayal. Jeff explains how disclosing betrayal can make recovery and

0:21.1

repentance so much more difficult if it isn't handled correctly.

0:25.0

This isn't a rip the bandaid off quickly type of situation.

0:28.0

With a better understanding of betrayal, church leaders can be a strong resource in helping couples navigate the awful effects of pornography usage.

0:37.0

You can watch Jeff's entire presentation at no cost in the Liberating Saints virtual library.

0:42.0

Simply go to leading Saints.org

0:44.0

slash 14 and you can sign up for 14 days of free access

0:47.8

to Jeff's presentation and the entire library.

0:50.8

It's one of my favorite interviews.

0:53.0

Hey, if you're a newbie, the leading Saints is important that you know, what is this

1:00.6

leading Saints thing? Well, leading Saints is a nonprofit organization dedicated helping

1:06.0

Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. And the way we do that is through content creation. So we have

1:12.4

this phenomenal podcast, we have a

1:14.0

newsletter, we have virtual conferences, so much more. Articles on our website, I mean I

1:19.0

could go on and on, right? And we encourage you to jump in, check out leading saints, go to the search bar at leading

1:25.5

saints.org and type in some topics and see what pops up. We're just glad you're here to join us. Hey everyone, welcome back to the leading Saints podcast.

1:39.0

I'm excited to introduce you to an old friend of mine

1:41.4

named Joe Spirit and we just happened to go to high school together.

1:44.8

He was a year older than me, just an awesome guy and we were reconnected a few decades after high school

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