The Reset You Actually Need - Day 3. The personality traits you are romanticising that are ruining your progress
Do You F*cking Mind?
Alexis Fernandez-Preiksa - Neuroscientist and Mindset Coach
4.9 • 914 Ratings
🗓️ 13 January 2026
⏱️ 25 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
The Reset You Actually Need – Day 3
So many people believe their struggles are just “part of who they are.”
In Day 3 of The Reset You Actually Need, we unpack the personality traits people often romanticise - like being chaotic, overly self-sacrificing, emotionally intense, or the crazy party animal, and how these traits quietly sabotage growth, consistency, and self-trust.
This episode explores:
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Why you cling onto certain traits as your armour even though they conflict with the person you are trying to become
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The psychology behind identifying too strongly with struggle
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How to evolve your identity without losing your edge
If you’ve ever described yourself as “so chaotic,” “bad with routine,” or “a perfectionist,” this episode will help you see where personality ends and self-sabotage begins.
This isn’t about becoming boring or losing what makes you you.
It’s about upgrading the parts of your identity that are no longer serving your future.
Part of a 10-day mini-series designed to reset your mindset, standards, and sense of self for the year ahead.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
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| 1:05.6 | Hello, beautiful beans and welcome to the podcast episode of today. So this is day three of the |
| 1:16.9 | mini series, of the 10-day miniseries, which is the reset that you actually need. Obviously, |
| 1:22.8 | if you haven't already go listen to the last two days, day one, which was all about implementing ways that |
| 1:30.3 | you can change your state in order to be able to approach things differently. And then we had |
| 1:34.5 | yesterday, which the whole episode was about how you can change your standards and how it |
| 1:40.3 | doesn't have to require that much more action. It's just a little bit more clarity and consistency, |
| 1:45.6 | and that's going to get you kind of, it's going to get you really far as far as relationships |
| 1:50.2 | and, you know, your self-esteem and all of that. |
| 1:52.5 | And today is day three and we are talking about the personality traits that you are romanticising |
| 1:58.8 | that is ruining your life. |
... |
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