The Psychology of Influence, Part 2 #269
The Brian Buffini Show
Brian Buffini
4.8 • 2.4K Ratings
🗓️ 16 March 2021
⏱️ 29 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
“If you have the right heart and the right motives, and you go about this the right way, you will be a person of influence. You will become a master of influence.” – Brian Buffini
The art of persuasion can be a powerful force for good, but it must be done for the right reasons and in the right way. In this episode, inspired by Robert Cialdini’s classic bestseller “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion,” Brian shares three more principles of influence and persuasion. Topics discussed include: why it’s important to slow down and break bread with people, why actions speak louder than words and why you must lead yourself before you can lead others.
YOU WILL LEARN:
- Why the likeability factor is so important.
- How to be an effective leader.
- Why the principle of scarcity must be authentic.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
“Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion,” by Robert Cialdini
Episode 267, The Power of WHO – an Interview with Bob Beaudine
Episode 227, The Leader’s Edge
“Love is the Killer App,” by Tim Sanders
“Emotional Intelligence 2.0,” by Travis Bradberry
INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES FROM THIS EPISODE:
“To positively influence people, you have to really make a deep impression on how you make them feel.” – Brian Buffini
“We want to do business with people we like.” – Brian Buffini
“It's amazing how interesting people find you when you're interested in them.” – Brian Buffini
“I find that if I'm kind to myself and gracious to myself, I can be kind and gracious to others.” – Brian Buffini
“The power of doing the right things, in the right way, with the right intent - and maintaining that standard for yourself - is a deposit in your own mind and your own heart that will be the making of you.” – Brian Buffini
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Music |
| 0:14.0 | Welcome to the Brian Bafini Show, where we explore the mindsets, motivation and methodologies of success. |
| 0:20.0 | Here's your coach, Brian Bafini. |
| 0:23.0 | Music |
| 0:39.0 | Well, the top of the morning to you, welcome to the Brian Bafini Show, and welcome to the second half of our topic, the Psychology of Influence, where we've been covering the six principles of persuasion. |
| 0:51.0 | In episode one, we covered reciprocity, commitment and social proofing, and in today's episode, we're going to cover likability, leadership and scarcity. |
| 1:01.0 | This is all based on the book Influence, the Psychology of Persuasion by Robert Caldini. |
| 1:07.0 | So first, I'd like to talk about likability. |
| 1:10.0 | You remember Sally Field when she won the Oscar? Her thought as she ran to the podium and she didn't have an acceptance speech. |
| 1:17.0 | She held up the Oscar with one hand and she said, they like me. They really, really like me. |
| 1:24.0 | And I thought, wow, in so many ways, that was a profound speech, because so many people are looking for that Oscar, that approval that people actually like us. |
| 1:34.0 | Now, and many of us know it's kind of a fool's errand to constantly be seeking the approval of others. |
| 1:40.0 | The truth of the matter is, Sally, they like you in that role. It doesn't mean they like you all the time. |
| 1:45.0 | And as every actress who ages realizes, hang on a second, they don't like me as much as they used to. |
| 1:51.0 | But for that moment, they like to like ability is a significant part of the Psychology of Influence, Cordon, Caldini. |
| 1:59.0 | So what do we know? We want to be liked. We're going to cover what's called the luncheon technique. |
| 2:04.0 | And we also going to talk about we want to do business with people we like, which I'm all in favor of and have been speaking on for 30 years. |
| 2:12.0 | Acceptance and empathic interaction are third on Maslow's hierarchy of needs. You probably cover that in your high school. |
| 2:20.0 | And the only things more important are safety and basic needs. So acceptance and empathic interaction is a huge deal for all of us. |
| 2:29.0 | Michael Scott from the office, one of my favorite quotes says, do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. |
| 2:36.0 | I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it's not a compulsive need to be liked. |
| 2:42.0 | Well, we know that Michael Scott as a leader was a terrible leader because he wanted people to like him. |
... |
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