The Next Thing You'll Hear Is The Sound Of Me Hanging Up

Imani State of Mind

Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Hobbies, Education, Leisure, Self-improvement

4.8 • 764 Ratings

🗓️ 19 November 2020

⏱️ 69 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We all need a little space — even from the people we love — and the best way to make room for your whole self is to set boundaries. With the winter holidays approaching, Imani and Kam are joined by an expert close to home: Imani's own mom, Paula! Learn how to ask for what you need from your friends and family. Plus, Imani, Kam, and Paula help YOU Get Your Mind Right and answer listener questions about mental health. Keep up with Dr. Imani on Instagram @doctor.imani and on Twitter @doctor_imani. If you have a question for Dr. Imani, email [email protected] or leave a voicemail at (424) 235-0064‬. Imani State Of Mind is taking off next week for Thanksgiving - we'll be back with a new episode on 12/3.

Transcript

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0:00.0	There was a period in time maybe, I don't know, this year, maybe a month or so ago, where I have a friend and we've been really close, but I realized I needed to set a boundary with her. So Cameron's actually talked about this in the past about having a friend or having a friend who's kind of like an emotional vampire.
0:23.0	And that's kind of what this relationship was turning into. I definitely felt like she was
0:28.9	demanding a lot of my time and I would offer suggestions, but nothing would ever change her mind or
0:35.9	she didn't really, it sounded like she just wasn't willing to do
0:38.6	the work and I got to be honest it really made me feel first overwhelmed and then I just felt really
0:44.4	annoyed and I think that was really coming through in my voice because this this person picked up on it
0:50.2	so I thought about it and thought about and thought about it for maybe like a few days and I actually
0:55.8	journal about it. And then I was like, yo, I got to do something about this because this is in the
1:01.4	forefront of my mind. I really need to handle this or, you know, handle setting a boundary with this
1:06.2	person. The thing about setting boundaries is I'm great with setting boundaries at work.
1:11.6	I'm great with setting boundaries.
1:13.0	But when it comes to my life, oftentimes I have to think and stew over things before I really tell someone like, yo, like I need for this boundary to be established in our relationship because this is getting to be too much for me,
1:28.9	which I was really proud of because in the past, I have either not set any boundaries and then
1:35.7	just ghosted the person or I would try to set boundaries and then we'd end up arguing.
1:40.7	So this person, this particular friend, she understood and I was worried that setting this
1:46.5	boundary would be the end of our relationship, but it turned out that it actually is better than it
1:51.2	was before.
1:54.7	I just want to drop it hello.
1:57.5	Taking care of our minds is just as important as taking care of our bodies.
2:01.5	But how do you even start that journey?
2:03.3	Think of Imani's state of mind as your beacon of sanity on your path to getting your mind right.
2:07.7	We're in this together, y'all.
	...

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