I'm sorry, you can sit there and look and play with all your silly machines as much as you like.

Is Gas going to have a crack? He is, you know. Oh, he's there! Brilliant! He's round the goalkeeper, he's done it!

Absolutely incredible!

He launched himself six feet into the crowd, and Kung Fu kicked a supporter who was eyewit without a shadow of an out giving him lip.

Oh, I say, it's amazing.

It does it tame, and tame, and tame again.

Frank of the music, charge a glass.

This nation is going to dance all night.

We all miss football, the sights, the sounds, even the smells.

But a crucial part of loving football that much is also being

intensely annoyed by it. From underhit crosses to nine-man five-a-side games, it's time for a

celebration of low-key irritation. Brought to your ears by the athletic, this is football cliches.

Joining me once again is Charlie Eccleshare. Hello.

Hello, Adam. How are you doing?

I'm all right. I was thinking last week when you're like, you'll be back. I'm becoming that

sort of keen Sunday League fullback who is just sort of always around and available.

First to answer the email on a Thursday. Yeah, yeah. Just very happy to be here.

I'm glad you're here because the first thing I'll ask you for this episode, irritation is a healthy emotion, isn't it? I feel like it's one of the pillars of football fandom. It isn't all about glee and joy. It's about being annoyed, being paranoid, yeah? Yeah, I mean, it reflects how much we care, I think, as well, doesn't it? You know, we strive for this almost level of perfection in football.

We really, really value it.

So that the little things that impinge on that bother us probably a disproportionate amount.

Hmm.

And familiarity breeds contempt, they say, but yet you're still here.

...