The missing ingredient that can sometimes make or break a new relationship

The Overwhelmed Brain

Paul Colaianni

Therapy, Emotions, Sad, Health, Mental Health, Personal, Abuse, Anxiety, Relationships, Health & Fitness, Psychological, Self-improvement, Mind, Stress, Emotional, Anger, Philosophy, Divorce, Psychology, Addiction, Happiness, Happy, Development, Thinking, Success, Education, Frustration, Sadness, Manipulation, Resistance, Brain, Depression, Overwhelm, Mental

4.5 • 2K Ratings

🗓️ 14 July 2024

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Sometimes making new friends or romantic partners takes more than compatibility and similar values. There's an important ingredient to making connections at a deeper level and keeping those connections in your life. At the end of this episode, I share the results of a relationship survey I created. Where do many couples people meet? How do they meet? Lots to talk about.

Transcript

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0:00.0	There are There really is a lid for every pot. I've learned this and sometimes it still surprises me, still surprises me in terms of say a romantic relationship. I had somebody write to me a couple years back. It was during COVID.
0:31.0	And they wrote, you know, I'm 33 and I have no idea how to find people.
0:35.6	It's getting harder and harder.
0:37.6	And when I was in a relationship, because I've never been in a real relationship, but when was in one I couldn't figure out how to reciprocate
0:46.9	their interest and it would take me even a year to get back to them.
0:50.8	And so they lost interest.
0:54.8	And that makes sense after a year waiting for me to respond
0:59.1	that they would lose interest.
1:01.1	And none of these guys were people I would have chosen for myself.
1:04.0	It was more like, oh, let's see where this goes.
1:06.0	So it sounds like there was something that she wanted to create,
1:11.0	but maybe not with those people.
1:15.0	And this is a very tough situation, very tough area to cover.
1:21.4	In fact, I'm going to do this. I once polled the audience that you, the listeners, and I asked
1:29.4	them, where did you meet? How did you meet this person? What were the circumstances?
1:36.0	Because there are people out there who can't find someone to bring into their life and have a connection to be
1:43.8	be intimate, to have somebody they can call their partner.
1:48.7	And you know, you may be in a relationship now or maybe you know someone who's not in a relationship now or maybe you know someone who's not in a relationship that could probably maybe benefit from listening to this and I think what I'm going to do is finally pull out that spreadsheet I made. I haven't used it. I did the poll and I never used it. I think it's time. I think it's time to do it. I know people are listening right now. Why didn't you do this five years ago? I agree. It's just that the subject matter didn't
2:17.1	come up and everything has the right timing. It's another point I want to make. Everything
2:22.3	has a timing to it. There's a lid for every pot.
2:27.0	Everything has the right timing. My mom, she got divorced and was alone and was perfectly happy being alone because who she
2:37.5	divorced was a nightmare. So that part of her life was over. She was in her 70s when it happened and she was done. She was happy being single.
	...

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