Welcome to love and abuse, the show about navigating the difficult relationship.

You deserve respect and kindness.

All the information on this show is meant for educational purposes only.

Always seek a professional for your mental health and well-being,

and always pick your battles wisely.

I'm your host, Paul Koliani.

Let me ask you what might seem an unfair question, and that is, if you owned, or if you got an

an animal, like a cat or a dog or whatever, and it was cute, and you loved it, but there was a small quirk with it and that quirk was it

either scratched or bit you every day let's just say that you have a cat and it scratched you in the

face every day and then later on it was cute and let you pet it and it would have these sweet purrs and meows.

And then the next day it scratched you in the face again.

Or with a dog, it bit your arm every time.

It just bite you.

Even though it loved you and, I mean, you know where I'm going.

You know where I'm going with this.

It is very much like a trauma bond.

A trauma bond is you love something so much, yet that person, that thing hurt you.

But you love that person or that animal or whatever.

But you are hurt by it. And the hurt happens almost every day, if not more than once a day. I had somebody write to me and they said,

I have a huge problem. I don't know what to do. I met the love of my life and he moved across

the country to be with me. But after he got here, he changed massively. Both of his exes cheated on him. I'm a bubbly,

outgoing, nice person. I'm social. I love my friends. I make new friends. And some people I talk to are

...