Danny Wallace

Brady OX

Well hello and welcome to another important broadcast podcast from your podcast pals.

Here we are.

You know, just skid it up outside your house in our broadcast van.

Tornado 9.

And I've been in the passenger seat.'s been driving he forgot he didn't know

how to drive and his knuckles are white and he can't get his grip off the steering wheel so scared

is he I'm super cool I kick open the door I leap out bang you see my boots on the ground

you look up it's Wallace and then I click my fingers and the side door opens and Steve falls out. Boom, onto the floor. A lot of lager cans. My glasses fall off. Exactly. Where are we? I'm wearing a lab coat, though. Yeah, because you've been doing tests on the way. Tests in the back, yeah. Because we're here to rid your house of ghouls. Yeah, that's it. And I'm like, I have my little electronic thing and I point it to the house and I'm like, and I'm like, in there, Dan. Yeah, and I go, I'm getting in. And I push past the listener. I say, Let me act this ghoul, and I kick open the door. Listen, it's like, what are you doing here? Like, you can't come in my house. Yeah, no, they wouldn't. They would fall to their knees in deference and thank me. Thank you. Thank you, Danny. Just a little annoyed that we'd made such a mess of their front lawn. Oh God, yeah, because we crashed into the lawn and just tied it all up. And we have to boot the door open because there's no time. Yeah, anyway, it's an easy job. I get straight in. Bosch. The ghoul is in my plastic bag that I got. I scrunch it up, pop it in my pocket. And as a little parting gift, gift I flip what looks like a coin they're like

how can we repay you and I go no no this one's on me and I flip the coin and it arcs through the

air and as it's up in the air we're back in the van and we're gone but as it lands in their palm

and their hand they look, it's a podcast. It's coin-operated podcast is what we're going for. So you pop it in your podcast machine. Yeah. Pop the coin in. And it's this bit now. And you're like, but that just happened. Yeah. How could it, how could they already have recorded this? It's amazing, isn't it? Only works in the European podcast machine. Don't try and put that coin into a US one. No. Oh, God, no. You're doing it. And then Joe's going to come out and declog it. You're going to get your screwdriver out. I don't do it for free either. So that's a big old job. Yeah, you charge us flat fee. Yeah. It's a pound. It's a reasonable flat fee though. Yeah. It's a pound. It's a pound, right? I'll pay a pound for you to declog my podcast machine. And you do that countrywide? Oh, God, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. We should really invent, really, a jukebox, but for podcasts that we can put into a pub and it should be kind of the size of

a phone yeah yeah and you should be able to pick it up or carry it with you yeah plug it into

different things or not even plug it in at all yeah just for you and then touchscreen yep and then you

have access to all the podcast all the podcast and you just pick one pick one listen it. It'll never take off. No. Also, you shouldn't pay for it. It should come under... It should be free as point of use. It should be free as point of use. Yeah, get on that. So what else is on today's important broadcast? We'll tell you what we had for dinner and where I parked.

Begin.

Ray D-O-X.

Steve, in particular, I addressed this to you.

Because you are the very epitome of the London Liberal Media Elite.

Yeah, yeah. Living rent-free in a place with a skypool, working for Google, wearing

lanyards, all these different things that you do. Snowflake that doesn't know he's born.

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