The Grieving Brain with Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Being Well

Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.8 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 July 2022

⏱️ 70 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

There’s a lot of loss in the world these days, both in our individual lives and in our broader communities, and with those losses comes grief. Grief is one of the most challenging emotions to be with, and it can be difficult to offer generalized advice because everyone's experience of grief is profoundly unique. On today’s episode of Being Well, Forrest is joined by one of the world’s leading researchers on grief, Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, to help us better understand grief and grieving. They explore why grief is such a unique and intense emotion, how grief works in the brain, the problems with generalized models like the “five stages of grief,” and how we can learn to live with loss. About Our Guest: Mary-Frances is a neuroscientist, clinical psychologist, and associate professor of psychology at the University of Arizona, where she directs the Grief, Loss and Social Stress Lab, which investigates the effects of grief on the brain and the body. She’s also the author of the wonderful book The Grieving Brain: The Surprising Science of How We Learn from Love and Loss. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and disclaimer 3:35: Mary-Frances’ personal background 6:55: Distinguishing grief from grieving 9:20: Self-criticism, and the over-focus on recovery 11:20: Grief isn't "something to get over" 13:00: Attachment, and our neurological map 16:00: Prediction error 19:30: Complicated grief 25:00: Spiritual practice, or having a worldview that incorporates death 28:05: Is there a ‘normal’ grieving process? 35:25: Pathology, and normal human experiences 46:00: Neurological overview of grief in the brain 50:40: The Dual Process Model of Grief 54:10: Sometimes distraction is okay 56:15: Therapeutic practices and learning from grief 1:01:00: Grief and its relationship to love 1:03:40: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome to Being Well, I'm Forrest Hanson.
0:10.3	If you're new to the podcast, thanks for joining us today, and if you've listened before,
0:14.1	welcome back.
0:15.4	It feels like there is a lot of loss out in the world these days, both in our individual
0:20.2	lives and in our broader communities, and with those losses comes grief.
0:23.9	There's a little more painful than grieving the loss of something you love, and everyone's
0:28.2	experience of that process is going to be unique.
0:31.1	As you can probably guess if you've listened to the podcast for a while, I'm the kind of
0:35.0	person who finds comfort in understanding how something works.
0:38.8	I feel like the better I understand something, the more I can do about it.
0:42.8	So to help us learn more about our experience of grief, how grief works in the brain,
0:47.0	and how we can use that knowledge to help us learn to live with loss, we're joined by
0:51.1	one of the world's leading researchers on grief, Dr. Mary Francis O'Connor.
0:55.8	Mary Francis is a neuroscientist, clinical psychologist, and associate professor of psychology
1:00.6	at the University of Arizona, where she directs the grief, loss, and social stress lab,
1:06.5	which investigates the effects of grief on the brain and the body.
1:10.0	She's also the author of the wonderful book, The Grieving Brain, the surprising science
1:14.2	of how we learn from love and loss, which I had a great time reading to prepare for today's
1:20.1	conversation.
1:21.6	I loved having this conversation with Mary Francis.
1:25.0	I think it was so rich and deep and heartfelt, and I also wanted to give a couple of little
1:30.2	disclaimers about it as well.
	...

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