The Government Controls The Weather with Tess Lynch
Lizard People: Comedy and Conspiracy Theories
Lizard People
4 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 6 November 2020
⏱️ 68 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week it might seem like the government can't even control an election. But of course, as we've learned time and again on this podcast, there are always deeper levels to what the government is actually doing. And this ep we're joined by the truly delightful podcaster Tess Lynch to learn about one thing the US government may be playing their 5D chess with - the weather! This grand unified theory ties together chem trails, hurricanes, polymers, big canons, climate change, Gore v Bush, Kate Bush, radio waves, slime videos, and way way more. Tess came prepared and you WILL learn something from this episode.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | The Were you guys ever paranoid-eyed COVID and just going around sniffing stuff because of the loss of smell? |
| 0:22.0 | Most mornings I wake up and go, |
| 0:24.0 | I feel bad. |
| 0:26.0 | Oh, can I smell stuff? |
| 0:27.0 | I don't like smell my pillow or my hand. |
| 0:29.0 | And then I'm like, oh, you feel bad because it's morning |
| 0:32.0 | and you have a bad body and you always feel bad. |
| 0:34.7 | Same. |
| 0:36.7 | Every little headache I'm like oh this is it and then I go no I'm dehydrated. |
| 0:40.9 | I'm always dehydrated. |
| 0:41.9 | Yeah same and also the allergies this year have been terrible because we had so much rain and everything's |
| 0:47.6 | blooming so much that it just seems unfair. It's like a cosmic joke in a way. I will say like the one upside is I used to go on |
| 0:56.1 | web MD and be like well okay which is it cancer, lupus, anemia like there were so yes there were so many things it could have been and now I'm just like every all of my health anxieties are condensed down into one |
| 1:11.2 | Super solid little nugget of terror. |
| 1:13.6 | So it's like a little bit of a relief. |
| 1:15.7 | In a way, I mean, just pairing down the list is nice. |
| 1:18.3 | It's now COVID is the one thing we've capped after the purge |
| 1:21.6 | of all other anxieties. But I also sometimes start to think |
| 1:25.8 | like how much I at least am like neglecting my health because I'm so scared to go to the |
| 1:31.2 | doctor. So then I'm like after this whole thing if it ever ends |
| 1:34.7 | there's going to be this wave of like now I have to deal with the fact that I haven't seen a doctor |
| 1:39.5 | in like a year and a half for anything and I've been like my spleen's done or all of the like |
... |
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