Hello and welcome back to practicing human, the podcast where every day we're getting a little better at life. I'm your host, Corey Miscara, and in today's episode, we're going to talk about the difference between relief and joy. More to come on that in a moment. First, let's settle in together with the sound of the bells.

Okay, so this episode is an invitation to explore where you might be mistaking relief for joy.

And by relief, I'm referring to those moments where we go from a contraction to release,

where there's compression and then there's space, tension, ease.

That shift, that contrast is inherently pleasurable. It feels good to no longer be in the tension. And since we just experienced something that we could describe as uncomfortable,

we're much more sensitized to anything that is not that, including neutral moments.

A moment that doesn't necessarily have a positive affect to it can be perceived as pleasurable and enjoyable.

And this is a fine thing. I mean, it's just a law of how we experience things,

but it can also get us into trouble when navigating our life, making certain decisions,

and often having the inquiry with myself of, am I genuinely happy in this experience or this

moment or with this person or what I'm

doing? And the reason that can get tricky is because you may actually just be addicted to a cycle

of tension and relief and feeling those moments of relief and release and ease that you're more sensitized to

because there's a lot of tension in the experience.

And our nervous system, especially if we are used to that from, let's say, a very dynamic

childhood, one that was unpredictable, that had a lot

of tension, but then there were these moments where there was ease, where things settled down,

it went from anger and chaos to love and coming together. You know, we can really associate

those moments of relief with a lot of pleasure and often

mistake them as life being really good or inherently joyful or, again, mistaking relief

for a genuine joy and a genuine sign that, oh, I'm moving in the right direction in my life.

I'm doing things that are bringing fulfillment and engagement and love and passion.

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