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Rude Tales of Magic

The Cave and The Mistress

Rude Tales of Magic

Bucket of Milk

Comedy Fiction, Leisure, Comedy, Fiction

4.91.3K Ratings

🗓️ 28 January 2020

⏱️ 86 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Patreon, dog! Get with the program.

And follow us on twitter @of_rude

That's an order, Lieutenant!

Subscribe to and rate Rude Tales of Magic on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review!

Follow the show:
Twitter: @of_rude
Instagram: @rudetalesofmagic

Advertise on Rude Tales of Magic via Gumball.fm.

Support the show: https://www.rudetalesofmagic.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This is a HeadGum podcast.

0:04.0

Ah, there you are, traveler.

0:10.0

Come inside, hang up your coat, put your feet by the fire, and I shall bring

0:20.0

you what you so desperately seek.

0:24.0

Rood tales of Magic, Albie, Bello, and Stirfry navigated the characters

0:40.4

and chaos of the delighted wife to hunt down clues as to the whereabouts of

0:44.4

Albie's missing family, discovering a lead in the name of a local crime lord,

0:49.1

Scrum Fabulous.

0:50.5

Meanwhile, Cordelia and Frederick abandoned the crew to walk the streets where they had a

0:56.4

disastrous and deadly encounter with the local police force.

1:01.2

We open on a dank cellar somewhere in the heart of Soaking Valley.

1:08.0

Ancient stones glisten with eerie sweat as putrid water drips down cold walls covered in moss and mold.

1:17.6

The sound of rats spawning and stale pools of blood can be heard over the dire den of footsteps and death rattles.

1:25.0

It's here that we find a badly wounded Cordelia crammed into a cell designed for criminals half her size.

1:33.0

Her poorly bandaged arm is hooked up to a makeshift life support system.

1:38.0

Tubes run in and out of vials and tinctures of diluted healing potions, a pale white-potted house plant, and dimly glowing

1:46.4

liquids, all culminating in a thick hose which feeds into Cordelia's bruised arm.

1:58.0

Will you read a little bit more? You want me to read a little more?

2:00.0

Yeah.

2:01.0

Okay.

2:02.0

Uh, so you've got to see before you die a child grabbing an apple from a tree.

2:08.0

Okay. This is the number two site that no commoner should miss.

...

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