We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick.

We are receiving this message.

We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick. We speak to you from our present, which we can

only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.

Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this monumental

reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.

So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology to decrypt our transmissions,

this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule.

This is the omnibus. Okay. You have accessed entry 145.

P.S. 11983, certificate number 1673. the Bottle Conjurer.

Roo, my fiction off an eagle, they'll never know you just a bagel.

Razzle Gazzle.

And they'll beg you for more.

Are you much of a prankster? I don't think of you as pranking people because it's kind of a little bit,

it's a little bit naughty or nasty even.

I disliked pranking before it was cool to dislike pranking. I came of age in the early 80s

where the media, you know, kind of the post-animal house media told us that pranking was the highest form of art and

culture and and humor. Yeah right it was the Porky's era.

Porky's Revenge of the Nords era era anything mean to do to anyone else is okay

but it also actually if they victimizes women yeah it was very sexist it was

...