Welcome back to another completely normal episode of your favorite daily comedy show — where we try to cover the news and instead end up arguing about how grown adults wipe.

It’s Friday, February 20th, and we kick things off with breaking news out of Overland… or at least what King Scott thinks is breaking news. Police standoff? Barracuda? Barricade? Nobody knows. But what we DO know is that Overland crimes are apparently “nice crimes.” So that’s comforting.

From there, things spiral — as they always do — into a full-blown Costco obsession. Beard nets. Free samples. Elite memberships. Business Costcos (??). Is it a warehouse store or a secret society? Why are people lining up 45 minutes for half a grape in a Dixie cup? And most importantly: why are people fighting with shopping carts like it’s Thunderdome?

Then we enter what may be the most detailed bidet conversation ever recorded on radio. Rafe is remodeling his bathroom and suddenly finds himself staring down a futuristic Japanese toilet that looks like it was designed by NASA. Heated seats. Oscillating spray. Adjustable nozzle trajectory. Butt dryer. Predator-style control panel. The gang debates the ethics of plug-in toilets, self-cleaning mechanisms, and whether standing up to wipe makes you a psychopath. It’s educational. It’s unsettling. It’s everything a daily comedy show should be.

And just when you think it can’t get grosser — hotel coffee machines enter the chat. A travel influencer suggests washing underwear in the in-room coffee maker. Yes. Brewing. Underwear. We unpack the horror of “panty coffee,” why you should never use hotel coffee makers again, and whether Big Bean (aka Starbucks) is secretly behind the propaganda.

But wait — there’s more chaos:

• A woman abandons her Goldendoodle at the airport because she didn’t fill out paperwork.

• A pediatric dentist allegedly shows up hammered.

• A school custodian hides in a locker room closet.

• A former police chief sets houses on fire as revenge.

• Thieves are feeding stolen iPhones into EcoATMs for $20.

It’s a rollercoaster of weird news, questionable humanity, and sarcastic humor — exactly what you expect from this daily comedy show coming straight out of St. Louis.

Bathroom tech. Costco conspiracies. Rage bait influencers. Swamp justice hypotheticals. And one extremely adorable abandoned dog named JetBlue.

Just another totally average day with Rizz and the gang.

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Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.

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