Terms & Conditions May Apply: What We All Need to Know About Modern Dating

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Esther Perel Global Media

Mental Health, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Education, Health & Fitness

4.7 • 15.6K Ratings

🗓️ 2 June 2025

⏱️ 54 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Dating often comes with a lot of questions. Who gets to say what they want? Who gets to be chosen? Who gets to choose? Should I stay on/off the apps? How much do I share, when, and how? This week, Esther gets set up on a blind date of sorts with three people, all deeply invested in the world of modern dating, to talk through what it's like out there and how she can help them navigate IRL dates. Topic: Dating & Romantic Consumerism Want to learn more? Receive monthly insights, musings, and recommendations to improve your relational intelligence via email from Esther: https://www.estherperel.com/newsletter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Dating is a phase in the life of relationships and in the life of people that is crucial.
0:10.0	How do we date? Where do we date? What are the protocols, the rituals of dating in different cultures?
0:17.0	Who gets to say what they want? Who gets to be chosen, who gets to choose, how do we swipe?
0:22.6	It's like a portal when you say the word dating and some of you are currently dating
0:28.6	and some of you are just so fatigued that you want to go cold turkey.
0:34.6	And others are wondering maybe I should go back and start dating again. And some of you
0:40.0	are in a relationship wondering, what would it be like? What's it like out there if I was to leave?
0:46.6	So dating puts us directly in touch with a host of questions about our relationships, what we seek there, how we see ourselves,
0:57.0	how we connect to each other. And I am here on a blind date with three people who are
1:03.5	currently dating, each with a completely different story, each at a different stage of their
1:09.6	life, some looking for partnership and lifelong relationships,
1:14.5	hopefully, and some looking to have good time. Some enjoy it, some dread it, and everything in
1:22.1	between. And part of updating, digital dating, allows us to meet an enormous amount of people that we would never have had a chance to meet.
1:32.2	And at the same time, the excess choice, the enormous amount of possibilities, the paradox of choice, the inability to just see one person emerge from this whole lot of people, brings fatigue, brings numbness,
1:50.2	and brings a certain kind of desocializing, you know, where we begin to treat each other
1:56.5	in ways that are very unkind, make us feel not really respected, esteemed, treated as a human being.
2:06.2	And sometimes we are on the receiving end of this and sometimes we are on the doing end of this,
2:12.6	as you can hear from some of the people in the conversation.
2:17.2	So let's talk about dating.
2:31.4	Support for where should we begin comes from Ferragamo.
2:35.0	Fatherhood can express enduring love and ongoing support,
2:39.0	marking the important milestones as well as creating small moments to cherish.
	...

Transcript will be available on the free plan in 7 days. Upgrade to see the full transcript now.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Esther Perel Global Media, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Esther Perel Global Media and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.