Tara Westover: Remaking Home

Everything Happens with Kate Bowler

Kate Bowler

Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 5.1K Ratings

🗓️ 12 April 2022

⏱️ 38 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What do we do when our families are sources of pain, confusion, or harm? How do we (or can we) outgrow our complicated childhoods when we no longer need the defenses we created? Today, I am speaking with Tara Westover. Tara earned her PhD in history from Cambridge, which is incredible on its own, but particularly when you remember that she had never stepped foot in a classroom until she was 17. She is the author of the bestselling memoir EDUCATED which describes growing up in a survivalist family and her costly pursuit of learning and unlearning. In this conversation, Kate and Tara discuss: How to navigate the religious baggage of our childhoods Learning to hold people’s point of views but without letting go of your own Why people aren’t always doing their best (and why knowing that helps restore some dignity) How to approach people who have different worldviews than us How to outgrow the defenses we develop as kids in painful or abusive homes CW: physical, emotional, and spiritual abuse *** Find Kate on Instagram or Facebook or Twitter. Be sure to subscribe to our weekly email for bits of wisdom, prayers, free downloads, and more. No Cure for Being Human (And Other Truths I Need to Hear) is now available wherever books are sold. Order your copy, today. Introducing, GOOD ENOUGH: 40ish Devotionals for a Life of Imperfection. Available wherever books are sold. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	When someone says the word family, what comes to mind?
0:04.3	An awkwardness or a natural ease, the warmth of being known, or the pain of neglect?
0:12.1	The image of the family is so deeply imprinted onto us, pressed into our minds and in our
0:18.0	hearts and in our sense of who we are in the world.
0:22.3	And so when people say things like, family is everything after all, or what can I do?
0:27.3	It's family.
0:28.8	It leaves many of us with a deeply existential question.
0:33.2	What do we do when our families are sources of pain or confusion or worse, harm, neglect,
0:40.3	or abuse?
0:42.5	How do we or how can we learn to let go of complicated childhoods when we no longer need the defenses
0:49.9	we created, defenses that once protected us?
0:53.8	But now we've long outgrown.
0:57.4	My name is Kate Boller and this is Everything Happens.
1:03.0	My guess today is the incredibly resilient Tara Westover.
1:07.6	You probably recognize her from the blockbuster bestselling memoir, Educated, that was released
1:13.4	a few years ago.
1:15.3	Today we have a very tender conversation.
1:19.1	We're talking about heavy subjects.
1:22.0	Tara survived neglect and abuse from her parents, especially from her older brother.
1:27.8	And now she is sifting through it with such wisdom to call for us.
1:32.7	It's so rich and surprisingly gentle about how she makes sense of it, where she feels
1:40.8	wronged, how she lives under the competing truths of people's best when she deserved
	...

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