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BBRB Ross Bolin

Welcome back to the Ross Bolin podcast. I am Ross Bolin here.

Welcome back to the Ross Bolin podcast. I am Ross Bolin here with Jared Boerse though.

J-Bone, I finally did it. You did what? I went on vacation. Oh yeah. I am still alive. Only I am very badly burned.

I went to Tulum. You know anything about Tulum? Tulum was a place I thought was one of those ancient Mayan temple sites for a long time.

People started going there more. Yeah, it kind of is. I mean they have a lot of that. They have Sinotes, which I think that's how it's pronounced, which are these little cave, waterfall, pond.

I don't really know how to describe them because I didn't go stuck to the beach, but I had never been either. Didn't know much about Tulum outside of its social media reputation. I would call it.

And it was every bit as ridiculous as social media implies. It's like all of the resorts were created specifically with Instagram and mine.

Like it is the ultimate influencers paradise and that part of it kind of made me nauseated to be honest. Like there was a damn mushroom jungle with all these crazy psychedelic statues and sculptures in the middle of our resort.

Like right after you check in, they walk you through it and they explain it to you. And it's just ridiculous. It's where you can go like trip balls and pray to a statue of the God who discovered ayahuasca or whatever. I'm not joking. They told you that they said, hey, you can trip balls here. No, but people do that.

Like it's very like the dude that was giving us this tour. I am pretty positive was high on mushrooms at that very moment like tripping.

His pupils were huge. It was like the strong majority of his eyeball. But yeah, so like it's just a ridiculous mushroom jungle thing. But every six feet in this magic forest that's supposed to be all about staying present and finding yourself.

There's a different set of decorations that are so obviously Instagrammable. Nobody can help themselves. And they're like the proper amount of COVID feet apart and shit so that people could continue to do this during the pandemic.

And totally by chance had no idea this was going to be a thing on the first day there millions and millions of butterflies had just hatched and I have never seen anything like it Jared. Absolutely fucking insane. And I'm not exaggerating like millions and millions. And I say this only for context tens of thousands of them died on the beach.

So I'll be honest when me and your family decided to get you this honeymoon president of sending millions and millions of butterflies to beautifully rain down upon your honeymoon. We didn't expect that many of them to die. But we hope you enjoyed the show regardless.

It was ridiculous. So like they're checking is in and they're like, it was a very thoughtful gesture by you and my parents. Thank you at the expense of all the other guests and perhaps even the resort because you could tell they were concerned when they're checking is in there like listen.

The larva and this is in like broken English too. So you're like, wait, what? They're like the larva just hatched and the flies are everywhere. That's like what the guy said. And I was like, I don't know. It's kind of looks kind of beautiful. Right?

It just like, but it went from the most beautiful thing I've ever seen to a total nightmare in like an hour. That sounds exactly like birth. Right? Yeah. Like it was so overstimulating and frankly concerning. Like I thought a swarm of them might descend upon me and there'd be nothing left.

Put a pile of bones when they were finished. That's how many of them there were. Like too, too many dude. Like you'd close your eyes on the beach and just relax and like the sound of the oceans washing over you and then open your eyes. Jesus fucking Christ.

Because they're everywhere. Is it like an Alfred Hitchcock the bird situation? Absolutely. It was like the birds but with butterflies and frankly I find birds and mass numbers to be a little bit less scary for some reason that I don't know man because it was just like I I've been to a butterfly museum. We have a great one at the Museum of Natural Science in Houston. Love that museum.

One of my favorite places in the world. Been there probably 50 times a lot of it over the course of my childhood. And that were a lot of you know they got they got Kanye and same district. It's literally around the corner from where from where Jay Prince Jay Prince met with Kanye at the chapel and and and forced him to do a concert with Drake in the name of Larry Hoover.

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