Stop People-Pleasing: Fight, Flight, Freeze & Fawn Somatic Healing with Kallie Somatics

After Reality with Courtney Robertson

Courtney Robertson

Reality Tv, Interviews, Tv & Film, The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, Villains

4.5 • 722 Ratings

🗓️ 10 December 2025

⏱️ 54 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

On this episode of After Reality, I’m diving into one of my favorite topics as a recovering people-pleaser: the nervous system. I’m joined by somatic practitioner Kallie Klug (aka Kallie Somatics), host of the Your Own Medicine podcast, who breaks down what really happens in our bodies when we shift into fight, flight, freeze… and the response almost no one talks about: fawn.

If you’ve ever apologized to keep the peace, said “yes” when you meant absolutely not, or shut down in conflict just to survive the moment, you might actually be fawning — a biological survival strategy wired for protection, not politeness. Kallie explains how fawning differs from everyday people-pleasing, how these patterns get formed, and why “just speak up!” doesn’t stick when your body doesn’t feel safe.

We talk nervous system triggers, how trauma shapes behavior, and why so many of us feel tired, resentful, and burned out from being “good” all the time. Kallie also shares practical somatic tools for boundary-setting (especially during the holidays) and we get into her upcoming book, Tired of Being "Good": A nervous system map for reinhibiting your body after a lifetime of fawning.

IG: @kali.somatics

Your Own Medicine Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-own-medicine-podcast/id1584877807

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of After Reality. If you've ever said yes when you really
0:06.2	wanted to say no, over-apologized just to keep the peace or gone through life on autopilot because
0:11.9	speaking up felt too scary, then today's episode is for you. As a recovering people-pleaser myself,
0:19.0	especially as a mom and former reality TV villain, I feel
0:22.1	like I've lived in freeze mode with a side of say yes, don't upset anybody. I'm sure you can
0:27.3	relate. So I'm so excited about today's guest. I am going to bring in semantic practitioner
0:33.3	Cali Klug, I don't know why that's hard for me to say, who helps people reconnect with their
0:37.1	bodies so they can feel safe enough to say what they actually need.
0:40.8	We are diving into fight, flight, freeze, and fawn mode, how your nervous system quietly shows up in everyday moments and most importantly, what you can do about it.
0:50.9	So welcome to the show, Callie.
0:53.6	I'm so excited to have you on today. I'm so excited to be
0:57.4	here. Well, I, you know, we were talking before I just hit record. And, you know, I heard about
1:03.0	thawning through Parvety Shallow. We have a mutual friend. And she was also, you know, named the Black
1:09.5	widow when she was on Survivor. And I kind of helped her when she was doing her podcast. But I listened to her book. And so this is a new term for me. And sorry, I botched somatic. Can you say it for us? Yeah, you're saying it right. Okay. I don't know what. It's just new. It's a new terminology for me. So I have been, I came across
1:28.6	her Instagram and I like felt instantly connected. I love your content and what you're doing.
1:34.6	You're wicked smart. I have devoured all of your podcast episodes. So I'm excited to share your
1:40.8	knowledge with my audience. And, you know, especially going into the holiday season and the
1:45.7	new year's approaching, I feel like this is something that can help help a lot of people.
1:52.3	Yeah, completely. But I would love to start with a little backstory. And maybe you could take
1:57.3	the stage and just introduce yourself. Tell us where we find you and a little bit
2:02.5	about yourself. Yeah. So it's funny that you mentioned Parvety Shallow. She and I co-run this course
2:10.5	that's really heavily focused on vaunting. And she's a big part of my backstory as well.
	...

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