Stop People Pleasing and Say No • 080
Mind Love™ • Consciousness, Spirituality, and Science for Awakening
Melissa Monte | Conscious Coach
4.9 • 906 Ratings
🗓️ 28 May 2019
⏱️ 55 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
If you find it hard to be assertive, directly ask for what you want, or say “no” to others, then you just might be suffering from too much niceness.
People pleasing shows up in a lot of different forms. We sometimes bed our wills and tend to the desires of people around us, we may not stand up for ourselves, we might just avoid conflict.
How would your life change if you could easily say “no” when you want to and need to, confidently ask for what you want, speak up more freely in all your relationships… all without feeling guilty or anxious or worrying about what others thought?
Our guest today is Dr. Aziz. He is a clinical psychologist and one of the world’s leading experts on social confidence.
Today we will learn:
- How too much niceness actually causes pain
- How to create boundaries and get the courage to speak up
- How to go from self-sacrificing to healthy self-interest
Show Notes: https://mindlove.com/080
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Transcript
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| 0:30.3 | Welcome to Mind Love, episode 80. |
| 0:33.0 | Today's episode is all about how to stop people pleasing and start saying no for a happier, more authentic |
| 0:39.0 | you. |
| 0:40.0 | Niceness requires a lot of suppression of our truth of our desires and that |
| 0:45.2 | actually creates usually unconscious in people but frustration anger |
| 0:49.4 | resentment you know and none of those feelings are nice none of those are acceptable so you push them |
| 0:54.1 | down too and you get a lot of internal stress that's why it's very common for nice people |
| 0:59.7 | to have a lot of issues related to their autonomic nervous systems. |
| 1:03.4 | Not only is this not a quote good or moral way to be because it's fear-based and ultimately probably |
| 1:08.6 | is more hurtful to others in a way over time like through avoidance and stuff, |
| 1:12.2 | but also it's like tearing you up inside and how does it feel like we all know it doesn't feel good so you're allowed and it's safe and it's okay and everyone will benefit in your life you and all your relationships will be |
| 1:23.8 | be enhanced as you become more you and become more you and become more |
... |
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