Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bail of Jesse Thorn. We're in chambers this week

clearing the docket. And with me, it's the great judge himself, Judge John Hodgman.

Oh, hi, Jesse. How are you?

Well, I didn't have it. You're not wearing a hat today. So I didn't have a thing to say about the

hat that you're wearing that wouldn't make any sense to the audience because they can't see you

and I can. This is my Halloween costume. Yeah. Guy in gray shirt.

Yeah. Well, yeah, first of all, that's spooky. And also some 50-year-old man who is trying to not

look like he's going through a midlife crisis by wearing wacky baseball hats all the time.

Got it. I was told by a grown woman who no longer lives in our house and now attends an

accredited four-year college that she would prefer that I not come to help her move in

for this semester, specifically because of hats. You're probably wear one of those hot hats.

I specifically, I think she was most concerned that it would not be a hockey hat featuring a

stink hockey team like the Platsburg pioneers, which was part of the junior Quebec League.

Or the one I just ordered in the mail from the Ottawa Nationals logo that I just ordered.

I think she was most concerned about wearing my day glow, Aaron Draplin hat.

Yeah. So I can understand that. I was told by an intermediary, a third party.

Don't wear a hat. And you know what? I didn't. I really made me think about myself and I'm wearing hats

less frequently now for that reason. That's good. It's good to have self-reflection, John.

But you know why I'm wearing this dark gray, almost black t-shirt? Why is that?

Because it's almost Halloween. That's the spooky season, John. Yeah. Do you know my Halloween song?

No. I made it up when I was 19 years old. I was working at Claire's Corner Copia in New Haven,

Connecticut. This is how the song goes. Spooky day. Spooky night. Halloween.

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