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Oh, ma'am, ma'am, my, my God. Good evening, everyone.

It's been a year, a year since the Palisades fire, and critics are criticizing Mayor Karen Bass for her terrible rebuilding efforts.

But the mayor scoffed saying, who are you going to believe me or a bunch of homeless people?

That's funny.

I expected more from you.

I'm not going to lie. After New York banned cell phones, teachers have discovered that many teens can't read clocks. They noticed this when the students kept showing up late for sex.

Former football player Matt Kaleel is reportedly suing his ex-wife

over her comments that his large penis

is why they got divorced.

And already, one man is offering

legal services for free.

He is a lawyer.

By the way, this is the first legal case of its kind,

but medical experts are already referring to the condition as gutfelditis.

According to a study, more men are picking up sewing as a hobby, which is helpful when they want to reattach their testicles.

That's a clean one.

Well, rumors that conjoined twins, Abby and Brittany Hensel had a baby, were

debunked.

But I'm sure one day they'll be a great mom

...