Slop Quest 125 O’Neill’s Rap Sheet

Slop Quest

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.9 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 6 April 2026

⏱️ 57 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/slopquest

Ryan attacks Andy about sword fighting again. Andy pulls the fake text prank on some kids and it makes O’Neill mad. Then Andy makes black bean brownies and sooooomeone has a problem with it. Then Ryan wants a new show where Andy is fading in and out of consciousness on drugs while Ryan roasts him. Our old screenplay, “Michael’s By The Sea”, gets more screenplay advice from Reddit. Ryan dreams about working with a chimpanzee on a podcast. Ryan tries to convince Andy to fight him but he doesn’t take the bate. Then in an amazing turn of events , Ryan’s brother finds an actual Valparaiso police report of his antics. It’s unbelievable.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, everybody, welcome to the podcast.
0:04.9	I am your host, uh, Andrew DeWitt.
0:07.9	Hey, hold on.
0:09.3	Oh, you know what he stole with valor?
0:11.6	I have a, uh, swordsman.
0:15.5	I do Hena, heimatoba battles.
0:20.1	I just battled last night.
0:21.5	I beat two 13 year olds and one 12 year old.
0:25.7	And it wasn't even close.
0:27.4	And it wasn't even close.
0:28.5	Why do you do this?
0:29.5	Why do you start with animosity?
0:32.1	I don't.
0:33.0	You lead with.
0:33.7	I start with Tomfoolery.
0:34.6	That's not Tomfoolery.
0:36.1	Your version of animosity and tomfoolery are flip-flops, my friend. That's chicanery. You're fucking dick. Okay. My name is Andrew DeWitt. Amateur swordsman. Amateur swordsman. Professional illustrator. But potentially ranked top 10 in the world. No. Hell no. I mean. Okay, 25. Can I just say, yeah, probably 25. I think I could get
1:00.9	top 10%. I think you are top 10% currently. You think so? I mean, maybe. I don't know.
1:08.2	I've got some, I have some blind spots.
1:15.3	I do better against people who are really, really good.
1:16.5	And really, really young.
1:19.2	Eight to 12, crush them.
	...

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