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Three minutes after 12 is the time. And almost every single phone line that was occupied within a moment of me launching mystery

hour is now empty again because we're getting so much repetition. If you've been trying to get

through and failing, try again now. The number you need is 0345-60-60973. There are two rules, of course,

repetition and dullness. We're constantly guarding against them. And, well, we're being stricter I think this week than we have in recent weeks because the repetition alarm has been going off rather frequently, which means judicious use of redire will give you your best chance in a while of getting through to the programme and getting your question on the board. If you have no idea what I'm talking about and you're new to Mystery Hour, allow me to suggest that you're in for a bit of a treat. The way it works is this. You have a question in your mind. It might be weird, it might be wonderful, it might be serious, it might be silly, it might need a professor to answer, it might need a parkkeeper. The point is, you need an answer. Maybe, maybe, maybe

you could look it up. Maybe you could use Google or something like that. Maybe you could,

maybe you couldn't. The point is you haven't. You get on board, you ask the question,

somebody else listening, who is also forbidden from looking it up. You have to answer from memory

and knowledge will provide the answer.

Sounds simple, well, it is simple, but it's incredibly good fun. Every single week, week in, week out.

I can't remember the last time I felt in any way let down by mystery hour, and I know most people

who listen to it feel exactly the same. So that's much all you need to know. It's a who or why,

when, why do we do that? Where does that come from? What's that for? It might be strange, might be something the kids have asked you. We're in the middle of half term, aren't we? So it might be some of the kids have asked you that haven't been able to answer. In fact, I think Mystery Hour, it's so long ago now, I can't fully remember. I think this started life as a way of prolonging the con that we know everything to our children. That's how it started life. The idea that you know when your children think you know everything? Omniscience, parental omniscience, and of course they realize pretty quickly that you don't. This just allows you to perhaps pretend for a little bit longer that you do. Oh, I do know the answer to that. I'll tell you tomorrow. Then you ring us, get the answer, you're laughing. 034-6-0973 is the number that you do. Oh, I do know the answer to that. I'll tell you tomorrow. Then you ring us, get the answer.

You're laughing. 0345-609773 is the number that you need. If it's a question that we've dealt with before, you'll be politely invited to move along. If it's a question that Caroline and Victoria think is dull, they will politely tell you so. Please don't argue. Their decision is final. and if you hear somebody else asking a question to which you know the answer, the number is the same. You will get through if you're patient and committed.

And the prize on the board is a mystery hour round of applause. Probably the most sought-after award on the whole of not just British radio.

The world's radio dial. Should I crack on and stop talking? Yeah, I think so too. Lisa is in Chigwell. Question or answer, Lisa? It's a question. Carry on. My son came home from school, very excited during the week. He said, can I do something on you? And I said, well, okay. It's not trying to be a tattoo artist, is he?

Well, I was a bit worried because he got out a black sharpy pen.

Right.

And he drew a little square on the top of my hand.

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