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Carol welcome to the program. Um, so I have a situation that I'd really like your advice with. Um, great. I have a daughter who is 22 and

And she will be moving home in a couple of months. Um, she was a college student and she why is she moving home in a couple of months? Why?

Um, because she graduated from college. She has a job, but she's going to live home between six months and a year just to save money before she's out on her own.

No, you let her be out on her own now saving her money. That's how you turn her into a competent, independent adult. The answer is no. You have a job figure out how to make it work because you're an adult now. I'm not going to take you back into the nest. I've never seen any birds do that with their baby birds. They feed them, they teach, they get them out of the nest. They fly away. They have fun for a bit and then they come back to the nest. You've never seen that.

Right. No, don't make it easy for her by this, you know, inexpensive, live at home and save money that annoys me to no end at parents do that. She has to learn how to apportion her money. She has to learn how to take two jobs to pay for anywhere she wants to live. This is how an adult moves on with their lives. They don't come home. Why don't you just give her a million dollars and send her out? That would actually be easier. I suggest you do that.

Sell your house, sell all your assets, give her the money, make her life even easier. She won't have to save.

Okay. Now I, I see what you're saying. That's what I did.

Well, why are you robbing your daughter of the same experience of growing up and being an adult and learning how to be self-sufficient?

Why are you coddling a 22-year-old and making it easy for them not to take care of themselves?

Yeah, I never look at why I didn't look at why are you doing that?

I didn't look at it that way, but you're getting me to see it that way.

Well, you said you went out on your own. Why are you not expecting the same from your child, adult? Why?

You want to rescue her and be the loving mother and have a good relationship with her? You hate her dad and you want to be the good guy.

You're lonely because you have nobody in your life. I mean, give me one of those reasons at least.

No, I don't want her coming back.

But you would not.

Ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, you agreed to it. What was your motivation for agreeing to it?

Why did you want to make her life easier than you had it? So she would be halted in her pathway to become an independent adult.

Why did you agree to it? Tell me the truth finally, please.

I'm going to tell you the truth because that's the only way you can help me if I tell you the truth.

She's always been a hard worker. She graduated from college a year early.

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