This is The Bird Show.

You're desperate, Kristen. You were desperate, desperate, desperate, desperate.

Desper times, call for desperate measures.

And even though I was vulnerable and I reached out in my moment of weakness, I got zero response and almost missed the wedding ceremony.

So I told you guys I was at a wedding in Kentucky this past weekend.

My husband's best friend married his lovely

fiance, Kelly. Kelly and Markham are now a happily married couple. And we are in Kentucky. Bart is

the best man. He's the only man in the wedding. I love Markham so much. He's like, yeah, no, this is like

one dude's fine. And she had four bridesmaids,

and they did not care. They were just doing their own thing. And I love it. So he was the best man by default. Bart, no, he was the chosen, the only man. Just the last man standing? No, there was other dudes, but Markham only wanted one person. He didn't want, he didn't want a bunch of groomsmen. He's like, all right, so, and Bart got, there was another friend Otis there, like, kind of, it was, it was jokingly giving Markham like the eyes, like, what, like I'm chopped liver over here? I don't deserve to stand up there, but it was, it was all funny and done in jest. So Bart leaves to go early to do photos, as one does, and I'm not going to be in these photos. So I'm back at the hotel room and I am taking my leisurely time

getting ready for this wedding

and taking, and I'm not going to be in these photos. So I'm back at the hotel room and I am taking my leisurely time getting ready for this

wedding and taking my long shower and, you know, beating up my face and doing my hair.

And then I put on the dress, which I absolutely loved.

But the way it clipped in the back around the neck.

So it was a halter dress with a zipper down the side, which was no issue,

even though I put it over top my head forgetting there was a zipper on the side,

like the idiot I am.

And I'm trying to get it latched.

There's two eye hooks that you have to latch on the neck of the dress.

And, you know, I get the fake nails.

And so my acrylics are not allowing me to attach this dress.

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