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Flats and Shanks

Series 3 - Episode 3

Flats and Shanks

Flats & Shanks

Sports

4.82.2K Ratings

🗓️ 17 September 2018

⏱️ 80 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A podcast about all sorts of semi-interesting stuff, but mainly Rugby

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hello, my name is Michelle. Welcome to the Flatson Shanks podcast. Today the guys are going to be talking red cards, deliberate blocking, rugby championship, Gallagher Prem and the pro 14 plus they've got gag of the week, which you won't want to miss. Enjoy.

0:15.0

Buddy and welcome to episode four of series three of our weekly podcast. I'm David flatman and I'm Tom Shanklin. How's it going Tom? Are you alright Dave? Are you alright Dave?

0:35.0

Are you scouts? I'm going from Rexham and it's just in between.

0:47.0

I'm Monday night football then. Thank you Michelle. That lovely intro. Doesn't sound like a retool. Does it put the posh's voice on him? Is that a golf club voice or something?

0:57.0

What's a golf club voice? I do Chris Chesney, obviously people know and he's the snake and it's just absolute vermin. He talks like that and he used to go, going, we're going to golf club now, sort of T off to. He's playing golf tomorrow, boys, day off, yeah. Hello, is Chris Chesney? Could I ring your T off time for tomorrow morning please?

1:16.0

Hi, I'm Synth bouquet. Where do Michelle grow up, mate? Nice bridge. Sorry, Oxfordshire. Yeah, Tom bridge, mate. So yeah, thank that's Michelle. That's all Michelle doing an intro budgets.

1:28.0

Saves a couple of euros and saves a lot of money actually by going to proper voice over when you don't need one because you got Michelle. Yeah, I mean some people might argue she hasn't got the sort of velveteen voice we used to have.

1:42.0

No, but I think it's fresh in it and it keeps her busy because she doesn't, you know, she doesn't, you know, she doesn't like sitting at the end of the day too much. You were going to say do much Tom, Tom, I made your joke about Michelle not doing much. She is a hard working unit. She's on top of it. She's at it. She is like a Japanese prisoner of war, but a happy one.

2:02.0

That's how the partridge by the way, God, I think it's every joke you make now you got to qualify it like I don't. I've got a joke here if you want to listen to it. But I made a joke on a Friday night commentating about liking fume rules and I was just like I'm going to get some grief for that. So I qualified it instead of celebration of life didn't mean it. You do though. Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that. I love fume rules always have. Have you been anyway? Flatters. I call you flatters. Who was it that was like he was. Oh, yeah.

2:31.0

Oh, yeah. I was sitting at the training ground once at Sarasons. I was injured standard at Bramley Road years ago. We're both there and somebody was like some academy player or second team player or something was like a squad player. Whoever it was. I can't remember it was sitting there and he was like as it going. As it going flat. As it going. Flatters. And I was like, no one calls me that except Johnny called the auctioneer and he's allowed. As it going. Flatters like good. Yeah, you know, living with so I live with living with shanks now. He goes.

3:01.0

I live with shanko. Do you remember someone called you? Shankers. Shankers. That's what the flat doesn't shankers. That's like who is this guy? Oh, no, it was. I can't remember who it was. It was a camera. His name. But he used to live by me and he had like a trial at Sarasons and one of the guys said, oh, how do you know?

3:21.0

I don't know the shank said. Shankers. Shankers. Shankers used to play. To the point where Kevin Sorrell, who's now the back coach at Sarasons, went to IKEA and got an oven glove for me and wrote shankers on the oven.

3:40.0

Did he? So got it somewhere. The Kev's parents still live on a barge. Have you? No, I don't. The Kev's parents still live on a barge.

3:50.0

Honestly, on a canal in Rickman's worth really. No, but you remember the boat people at Saras and we used to call them. They were like lovely people, but they were very, very, very committed Saras fans.

4:02.0

And one thing they're particularly keen on doing was telling you how keen they were on Saras. They're lovely people, by the way. But they would show you pictures of their house, which happened to be a barge.

4:13.0

And they'd called it the fairs or something and repainted it and the whole it was just Sarasons was their life. And then I just I just one day somebody was like, who are those people? Like they live on a Saras boat. I was like mate, don't take the Mickey. That's Kev's parents. That's Kev's parents.

4:27.0

And it just went around his parents with the boat people. Was it a pop a barge with bikes tied on the top back? Yeah, yeah, with like old trolleys on the top.

4:34.0

Little dog running across the top. Yeah, old rusty old supermarket trolleys lying on their side on the top of it. But I just told everyone that the boat people were Kev's parents. Maybe they were. Maybe they were.

4:46.0

Yeah, I don't know if I've met Kev's parents. I'm hoping they're alive. One of them, one of them has got a big nose. And one of them has got very long shallow, thin feet.

5:00.0

Which is size size 12. And you think not that uncommon for a rugby player to have size 12 feet. It is when you're I know five for eight five six like Kev.

5:10.0

Yeah, five six and you're and 69 feet. I used to do a boot up and there'd be no gap in between the laces. Yeah.

5:16.0

The lace holes would touch each other. They were closed in the middle. It was like a corset being done up solid solid solid player.

...

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