Warning, the following podcast contains sincere heartfelt reflections on community and friendship,

but don't worry, we also still say fuck.

This week's episode, The Skating Atheist, is brought to you by

plumethat.com, upside.com, and by our Mitch McConnell physical description contest.

This winner is at Baron Attyme, who had a brief dialogue that went like this.

He will sign his one. Nobody could make a half clam, half croissant.

He'll sign his two, hold my beaker, who played Baron Attyme.

I'm kind of hungry.

Next week we're going to switch over to describing Alex Jones in five words or less.

So send us your favorites using the hashtag, Skating Alex Jones.

You could be the next winner.

And now, Skating Atheist.

My name is Craig, and I'm just some guy from States, bro, Georgia.

I'm a former Mormon.

Mormons love genealogy, and my dad claims that he has traced my family's history all the

way back to Adam and Eve.

So obviously, I am the crowning jewel of all of God's glorious creations, all of you

smelly motherfuckers evolved from filthy, monkey men.

It's April 27th, and we haven't slept in four days, so this one's going to get weird.

Oh yeah, I'm no illusions.

I'm Eli Bosnick.

I'm Heathen Wright.

...