Warning, you really should have peed before you left today.

Today's episode of the Skating Atheist is brought to you by Horox Bleach Abstane Remover.

So for all you recently de-converted theists still struggling to overcome the sexual taboos

embedded in your mind by decades of sledge-shaming, hell-mongering, and bedroom advice from celibate

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Horox Bleach, safe for both whites and colors, even at the same time, and that's okay

now.

Now the Skating Atheist.

This is Chuck.

And Willie.

From Chuck and Willie's Book of Mormon Stories.

And we did in fact evolve from filthy monkey men.

Oh, it's a little monkey chuck.

Ah, these pretzels are making me thirst, eh?

It's all because of them.

And evolution's so easy, a caveman.

Oh, I have no illusions.

Ah, I'm Heathen Wright.

And from pluralistic New York, New York.

And as monochromatic as legally enforceable po-dunk Georgia, this is the Skating Atheist.

In this week's episode, we learn that God never learned to drive stick.

...