SC 148 - Past Trauma in Present Relationships - Pat Ogden

The Jayson Gaddis Podcast

Jayson Gaddis

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.7 • 999 Ratings

🗓️ 9 August 2017

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Pat Ogden PhD is a pioneer when it comes to somatic trauma therapy. Her work has touched many people including me. Even if you don't think you have any trauma, you likely have some living in your body that your partner will activate. In this episode, Pat has some great guidance to normalize and assist you in taking small steps that will greatly benefit you and your partner as you wade through the daily triggers of long-term relationship.

SHOWNOTES

What got Pat into studying human beings and trauma [10:00]
How Pat helped women who had difficulty experiencing sexual pleasure [13:00]
What is trauma? [17:00]
Why we see the ‘freeze response’ in people who were abused as children [19:00]
How childhood neglect can show up as trauma in adults [20:00]
What’s happening in the bodies of a couple who fights all the time? [22:00]
The pursuer and withdrawer dynamic in relationship [26:00]
Can we rewire our nervous systems together as a couple? [28:00]
The significance of the therapist-client bond [33:00]
What couples can do at home to work with their automatic nervous system responses [37:00]
Is there harm in retelling a traumatic story? [43:00]
Pat’s advice on embodying the self [49:00]

Transcript

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0:16.1	I've seen couples go round and on and on with words and no matter how much intention they have and how much they want this to work until they both can learn about those implicit signals they're giving off that are left over from the entrance of early trauma and attachment, the
0:20.9	words seem to go round and round and round often. So, What is up? What is up and welcome back to the relationship school's Smart Couple
0:50.0	podcast? I'm your host Jason Gatis. This is episode 148 coming to you from all the way over here in Boulder, Colorado.
1:00.0	I'm grateful for your ears and your interest in having deeper more fulfilling
1:09.0	partnerships. This podcast is about monogamy, essentially.
1:14.0	It's about long-term partnership.
1:16.0	It's about romantic relationships and how we do them well
1:20.0	after the drugs of the honeymoon phase wear off.
1:25.0	We interview lots of different people here, like Stan Tatkin, Gabor Mate,
1:31.0	Annie Lala, and so many others who have contributed powerfully to the relationship
1:38.9	field and moving intimate relationships forward.
1:42.8	We interview experts, couples, my wife,
1:46.8	and other various people to help you
1:51.0	get the most fulfilling relationship possible.
1:55.0	And we challenge you here to engage in the work, quote, the work,
2:02.0	because relationships take work.
2:06.5	And if you are deadly serious about the work
2:10.4	and doing some work to get a great relationship because that's what's required, then you study and you
2:16.8	train and you practice at places like the relationship school. We are about to begin the relationship school. We are about to begin the relationship school soon and it's
2:26.2	very very exciting. Speaking of which we had a contest and we are about to announce some winners. So check this out. So we just
2:38.5	finished the Facebook live announcing the contest winner for the relationship
2:44.2	schools live weekend on embracing conflict.
	...

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