You're listening to the micro version of the Savage Lovecast, www.com.

If you're stuck in a relationship quandary, or if you're looking for sexual harmony,

while there's nothing you can't ask on the Savage Lovecast.

It was the first email I read this morning.

It was sitting there at the top of the Savage Love inbox, just waiting for me.

I say this to you in love, but you will probably take offense.

The world now fully accepts the gay community as a fixture within civil society.

That's going to come as news to gay people all over the world, gay people in Saudi Arabia and Russia, but whatever, going on.

I am grateful to you for fighting against intolerance and hatred.

I pray now that you hear my next words.

You are leading millions to eternal damnation.

Blah, blah, blah. Judgment day approaches and eternal damnation awaits you, savage, but there's hope,

blah, blah, blah, because there's this Jesus Christ person, excuse me, this Jesus Christ deity,

one of hundreds of thousands, if not millions of deities,

coughed up like hairballs by human cultures throughout the millennia.

Zeus, Mars, Dengun, Shiva, Allah, Colligula, collect them all.

My correspondent assumes, against all odds, that I have never heard of this Jesus Christ person,

or this book he provided me with the Amazon link to called the Bible.

I am an American.

Even if you set aside the Irish Catholic thing and the dad was a Catholic deacon thing and

the mom was a Catholic lay minister thing and I went to a seminary for high school thing

and the baptism thing and the First Communion and confirmation thangs, even if I grew up Baha'i or Zoroastrian on the north side of Chicago, it isn't possible to be in this country for five minutes without having heard someone or many hundreds or thousands of someone's yammer on about this Jesus Christ person and the Bible. You can't live here. You can't

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