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Hey, everybody. Welcome to another installment of the Savage Lovecast. I'm Dan Savage,

and Lovecast is the once a week out loud call-in version of my sex advice column, Savage Love,

that runs in papers absolutely fucking anywhere that matters. The phone number here at 206,

201, 2720, and you download us every week at www.

www.com slash savage.

We've got lots of calls in today's show, so we're going to get right to it.

Ann, hey, I'm 36, and I'm getting divorced, and I'm starting starting to meet women and I'm just trying to figure

out how can I tell them I'm interested in non-committal sex?

I'm not really at the point where I can get into a relationship right now but I have

needs and I love women.

And I'm just thinking that, you know, if I tell them too early when I meet them,

I come off as an asshole thinking that they're interested in having sex and I'm starting to talk about that

and I'm sort of taking things for granted.

But then again, if I get too much into any type of relationship, if it's too late, then I can

off as an asshole because I didn't tell them soon enough that I was not looking for a relationship,

but rather sex.

So you don't want to seem like an asshole, which is a problem because I'm going to advise you

to be an asshole, or at least an asshole by some women's estimations. There's no way for you

to have non-committal, no strings attached sex with women who aren't advertising that that is

only what they want without some of those women considering you an

asshole. So what you need to do is, like you said, you rightly intuitive, if you bring it up

...