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I've been 34 years old for a long time.

Regular listeners, readers, everybody knows that my hodometer got stuck on 34.

I don't know how many years ago, but it's been a while.

And sometimes I feel a little old.

And one of those times I felt old, even though I am still officially 34, was I was in the grocery

store and I looked down at the usses and in touches and peoples and realized that I didn't

know who any of these people on the covers of any of these magazines were. Literally, and I'm not exaggerating. There wasn't a, you know, a Jen Aniston or anybody that I recognized. They were literally all these people I'd never fucking heard of. I'd never see. I didn't know why they were famous. So I had to pause. You know, I want to keep up to date.

I am only 34. I don't want to lose touch with kids today. So I paused and opened a magazine and

that's how I first learned about Kardashianisms, about these Kardashian folks who are on TV because

their father got OJ out of prison something, and they have large rear ends.

And they are shameless fame horrors.

What-Eves? You know, everybody's got to make a living.

Anyway, one of these Carducians got married, and now the big scandal.

I'm up on it is that it was Kim or Kelly or Kuki or Kedofi Kardashian.

I don't know who, but was married for 72 days to somebody who would have her and now she is divorcing after 72 days.

And there's been a lot of talk about this Carducian marriage in gay rights circles because this is so unfair that Kim, is it Kim?

...