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Happy Mid-Pride Month, everybody.

I'm sure it being mid-June, when you hear this,

that you've all seen the gay McDonald's ad,

the McDonald's ad that would never run in the United States of America,

as everyone from myself to Bill

O'Reilly has pointed out. In the ad, there's this insanely cute teenage French boy on the phone

in a McDonald's speaking to a classmate about his class picture and saying, I miss you, and rubbing

his thumb on one of the images. And clearly, whoever he's talking to is in the picture and has stuck his or her tongue into the boy's mouth. And then the dad comes over and sits down. And when the dad comes to the table with the lousy American chow, the French kid snaps off the phone. He says, oh, I'll talk to you later because my dad. and the dad sits down and says, oh, it's too bad that you go to an all-boy's school because you could really clean up with the girls. And we're left to, you know, to piece together the fact that this classmate, whoever the classmate is, that this boy is involved with is another boy. Oh, my God. And the tag on the ad is McDonald's,

Come as you are. And that sound you heard last couple weeks ago was Kurt Cobain spinning in his

grave. What's interesting about the ad is it's being, you know, talked about as this really

pro-gay, positive message that could never air in America because the

American family fuckwood association would shit its shorts and there would be an ineffectual boycott

called on McDonald's just like the ineffectual boycott called on Pepsi and everybody else who's

ever shined on the gay community in an advertising campaign much to the consternation of the right-wing

anti-gibigots but I don't think the ad is really all that gay, you know, they're saying come as

you are to McDonald's. Come as you are to McDonald's. Come closeted to McDonald's. Because the kid doesn't come out to his father. His father doesn't know. If it were really a gay positive ad, you know, the dad would sit down, the son would look at his father and say,

Dad, there's something I have to tell you, and then the camera would pull back,

and you'd see the dad reach across the table and place... would sit down, the son would look at his father and say, Dad, there's something I have to tell you,

and then the camera would pull back and you'd see the dad reach across the table and place a clearly, you know, his hand on his son's shoulder in an affirming, supportive way. Like it would be this coming out moment. Like, come as you are, come out at McDonald's. Why not? Come out at McDonald's. and then stuff your face with lousy chow and hurry the process of aging along so you will look like your slumpy father more quickly than you need to.

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