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You know, I've never much liked boats.

Smaller ones feel too fragile.

Larger ones seem unnatural out there in the water.

And whatever the size of vessel, it's really the endless depths below that creep me out.

It's not a rational fear, I know, but whenever I can't see the bottom,

I grow uneasy. It's like vertigo, but in the water. And while I'm thinking about things I don't like, there's the cold. I live in Dallas, Texas, and yeah, sure, I can certainly complain about

the heat. It can be oppressive, and you might like to think that it's easier to get warm than to cool off.

You just put on more layers, but there's a certain type of cold that gets in your bones.

I just shiver, no matter how thick my sweaters are.

And I'll add a third to this list, violence.

I have a real sympathetic response to seeing people get hurt.

Those fun little video shorts of trips, slips, and falls, I wince.

And I've never been in a fight.

I don't care if that disqualifies me from some Neanderthal definition of masculinity.

I am not interested in physical violence.

So in short, I don't like boats, I don't like the cold, and I don't like violence.

So I would be a miserable Viking.

But on today's Saturday matinee, we're bringing you the tales of some other men who very much enjoyed their cold boats and violence from the new Noisor podcast, Real Vikings.

I hope you enjoy.

While you're listening, be sure to search for and follow Real Vikings.

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