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On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Sadia Khan: Stop Ignoring Red Flags! (How to Train Your Brain to Know When To Walk Away)

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

iHeartPodcasts

Health & Fitness, Business, Mental Health

4.828.5K Ratings

🗓️ 26 May 2025

⏱️ 94 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Does anything in your life feel a little “off” right now?

Do you feel like you're settling for less than you deserve?

Today, Jay sits down with Sadia Khan, psychotherapist and relationship expert, for a deep and unfiltered conversation on love, commitment, and emotional healing in the modern age. Known for her bold and counterintuitive insights, Sadia brings clarity to the often murky waters of dating, self-worth, and relationship dynamics.

Sadia shares her powerful perspective on the importance of being able to walk away from disrespect, and how this one shift can transform who you attract and how you're treated. She challenges conventional dating advice by focusing not on what you attract—but what you entertain—highlighting the role of self-esteem in relationship choices. She explains why emotional unavailability feels attractive, how ghosting reflects poor communication habits, and why your dating app rejection might not be what you think it is.

Jay and Sadia dive into the core issues many of her clients face, including infidelity, fear of commitment, and men struggling with masculinity. She unpacks how a lack of male role models, the ability to set boundaries, and people-pleasing behaviors can derail modern masculinity—and how both men and women can break these cycles to build healthier love.

Sadia introduces the "Three A’s" women need to fall in love—Attraction, Admiration, and Adoration—and the "Three L’s" men need—Lust, Labor, and Loyalty—exploring how balance in these elements creates deep, lasting connection. She also breaks down why women might cheat on “nice” men and how misunderstanding emotional needs can lead to betrayal.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to Attract and Maintain Healthy Relationships.

Why Self-Worth is the Foundation of Love.

How to Avoid the Trap of Emotional Immaturity.

What Makes Men and Women Truly Commit.

The Real Reasons Behind Infidelity.

How to Build Masculine Strength in a Healthy Way.

Why Peace is Better than Constant Pleasure in Love.

This conversation is a masterclass in emotional intelligence and healing. If you're navigating heartbreak, struggling with self-worth, or seeking a deep, lasting relationship—this episode is for you.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

00:00 Intro 

01:17 How to Stop Fearing Conflict and Start Choosing Yourself

02:24 Why We Fall for the Emotionally Unavailable

05:31 The Hidden Dangers of Dating Apps

07:01 Is Wanting Similarity the Same as Settling?

08:40 How to Stop Getting Ghosted in Modern Dating

09:31 The Early Signs of a Healthy Relationship

11:19 The Two Most Common Relationship Struggles: Infidelity and Commitment

12:19 What Happens When Men Lack Masculinity

15:25 Why Men Need Stronger Role Models

18:21 The Unspoken Contract Behind People-Pleasing

19:25 How to Show Love Without Seeking Approval

21:12 The Real Reason Women Cheat on Good Men

24:55 How to Teach Others How to Treat You

26:14 The Three A’s Every Woman Needs to Fall in Love

32:45 The Three L’s Every Man Needs to Stay in Love

36:10 How to Avoid Being Just a Temporary Fling

37:49 Why the Person You Date Isn’t Always the One You Marry

40:42 Sexual Discipline: Why It’s Essential for Self-Respect

42:29 What True Psychological Intimacy Really Looks Like

45:15 Lowering Your Standards May Cost You More Than You Think

46:10 Is Getting Cheated On Ever Partly Your Fault?

48:59 How to Recognize When You’re Being Disrespected

50:13 Are You Loyal to the Marriage or Just the Person?

52:45 The Most Honest Marriage Vow No One Talks About

56:50 Why Some Men Keep Choosing the Wrong Women

59:40 How to Know If You’re Afraid of Commitment

01:04:23 Can a Broken Relationship Be Fixed?

01:06:59 Why Knowing Your Deal Breakers Is Crucial

01:09:03 The Worst Thing to Say to Someone After a Breakup

01:09:56 Why So Many People Stay Stuck in Heartbreak

01:11:43 How to Find Closure Without an Apology

01:15:59 Not Everything You Want Is Good for You

01:66:54 Sadia on Final Five

Episode Resources:

Sadia Khan | Website

Sadia Khan | Instagram

Sadia Khan | TikTok

Sadia Khan | YouTube

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

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0:00.0

This is an IHeart podcast.

0:04.1

Are your money scales total trash?

0:06.0

Well, you are not alone.

0:07.3

Personal finance ignorance is as American as Apple Pie.

0:10.3

But don't fret.

0:11.0

The How Do Money Podcast is here to help you improve.

0:13.0

Think, Matt, if your emergency fund was invested, especially given the volatility we're experiencing right now.

0:18.6

Outchy.

0:19.0

Investing, it is ultimately a necessity,

0:21.4

but you've got to keep that emergency fund accessible.

0:23.5

It needs to be cash parked in your savings.

0:26.2

It's time to increase your money knowledge.

0:28.0

And the How to Money podcast is here to bring the wisdom.

0:30.7

Open your free Iheart Radio app.

0:32.7

Search How to Money and start listening today.

0:34.5

Hey, everyone. This is Molly and Matt,

0:36.5

and we're the hosts of Grown Up Stuff How to Adult,

0:38.7

a podcast from Ruby Studio and IHeart Podcasts.

0:41.6

It's a show dedicated to helping you figure out the trickiest parts of adulting.

0:46.0

Like how to start planning for retirement, creating a healthy skincare routine,

0:49.8

understanding when and how much to tip someone, and so much more.

0:53.0

Let's learn about all of it and then some.

...

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