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LOVERS by shan

S2 Ep143: What My Autism Diagnosis Taught Me About Love and Feeling Safe ft. Chrisette Michele

LOVERS by shan

LOVERS by shan

Sexuality, Society & Culture, Relationships, Health & Fitness

55.5K Ratings

🗓️ 29 October 2025

⏱️ 41 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Calm your mind. Change your life. Try Calm by heading to https://calm.yt.link/2lLJh1b.
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This week, Shan sits down with Grammy-winning artist Chrisette Michele opens up about being diagnosed with autism as an adult and the way that revelation helped her understand her rhythm, her relationships and what safety really means for her. She shares how music became one of the few places that always made sense, how her mom stood by her through the unknown, and how she finally began to remove the mask and meet herself.

Later, we bring in expert Maria Davis-Pierre, LMHC, founder of Autism in Black, Inc., to guide a deeper conversation around autism, neurodivergence, intimacy, and how we show up for those we love.

Whether you’re neurodivergent, in a relationship with someone who is, or simply want to deepen your understanding, this episode invites you to explore how love, safety, and authenticity coexist.

Follow Chrisette Michele:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chrisettemichele/
Website:chrisettemichele.com

Follow Maria Davis-Pierre & Autism in Black:
Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/autisminblack/
Website:
https://www.autisminblack.org/

Sign up for the 5th Annual Autism In Black Conference
Virtual or In-Person Attendance: https://funnel.autisminblack.org/2025-autism-in-black-registration-page?aff=Christina-Schmidt

Want more Lover?
Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com
Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community
Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

The weather. Tomorrow, expect a biting cold front. Hmm, how naughty. I wonder what I'll be

0:06.8

wearing or taking off. The night will be wild and untamed. Expect heavy, lashing rain

0:13.0

that'll soak you to the skin. By Monday, temperatures will rise slowly but surely reaching

0:18.7

their peak in the afternoon.

0:23.0

Not in the mood for miserable weather?

0:25.8

Fly cheaply to Turkey with Sun Express.

0:28.7

Sun Express, nonstop sunshine.

0:34.1

Of late in the past few years, you shared that your life has been neurospicy.

0:34.6

Mm-hmm.

0:39.7

If you get diagnosed as an adult with autism, you will have to go down the list of your likes and dislikes.

0:41.1

When I found out, girl, it wasn't unheard of that being touched makes me uncomfortable,

0:46.9

being kissed, makes me uncomfortable, that I don't understand sexuality the way everybody else

0:51.3

does as soon as everybody else does.

0:53.3

There were so many things that I learned that if somebody would told me when I was like 12,

0:58.0

I went to the neurologist.

1:00.0

She said, your brain is fried, you have to stop.

1:03.0

So she spells out all these tendencies, socially awkward.

1:06.0

No boyfriend ever knows that because they see me on stage.

1:09.0

So they decide that because I can stand on a stage,

1:12.6

that I'm very comfortable in social situations.

1:15.6

So I go and tell this gentleman that I'm dating,

1:17.6

I am autistic.

...

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