S2 Ep142: Is It Too Late to Become Who I Thought I’d Be? ft Chy Fontenette
LOVERS by shan
LOVERS by shan
5 • 5.5K Ratings
🗓️ 22 October 2025
⏱️ 49 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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In her mid-30s, Chy Fontenette from Behind the Likes podcast finds herself facing what feels like a full-life reset: a breakup she didn’t choose, friendships shifting as she starts setting boundaries, and a growing awareness of the pain she’s carried for years. Through tears, honesty, and reflection, Chy admits she doesn’t know what’s next, and Shan reminds her that she’s doing the most important thing of all: staying with herself through it.
This episode is for anyone in that place where everything hurts and nothing feels certain. Shan offers tangible guidance on how to move through the fog, from becoming an archaeologist of your own life (digging up the moments you felt love and success before) to remembering Steve Jobs’ wisdom that you can’t connect the dots looking forward, only backward.
The message is simple: you can’t rush this part. But if you keep caring for yourself, one day you’ll look up and realize, your life doesn’t feel so heavy anymore.
Follow Chy Fontenette!
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chy.f/
Listen to her podcast “Behind the Likes”: https://www.behindthelikespodcast.com/
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This person broke in? |
| 0:01.0 | Broke into my house, just like a hoodie on, was just literally staring at me. Not one person came out, not one person, and I could never even redo that scream that I scrapped. Was that a word? Scrumped. No one ever wants to know how you're really doing. And I was like, noted. I always used to joke, I'd be like, I'm enough for two people. I'm a handful. |
| 0:21.6 | I have this personality, I'm big, I'm vibrant, I'm all of these things. |
| 0:24.6 | Oh, Shai's gonna do it, Shai's gonna say this, shall be fine. |
| 0:26.6 | And like, I don't have to come to Shai's birthday. Shai's not gonna care. Now I give a fuck. show up for me like how I show up for you. |
| 0:33.6 | You know what I'm saying? |
| 0:34.6 | Now I care. |
| 0:35.6 | And now it's been a problem lately. |
| 0:36.6 | But here we are. |
| 0:37.6 | So my life has just been a roller coaster. |
| 0:39.6 | I've been touring with my podcast. |
| 0:43.3 | So I've just been on a roll, honestly. I've just been rolling. |
| 0:45.3 | Vibing, single. |
| 0:51.3 | Oh no. Shit. I said I wasn't. |
| 0:55.0 | Am I pretty? |
| 0:57.0 | You're so beautiful. |
| 0:58.0 | 29 was probably the worst year of my life. |
| 1:01.0 | And then when I turned 30, things started to turn around. |
| 1:03.0 | But I was so desperate to get out of the bad that I think I made it worse for myself by constantly looking for saviors. |
| 1:10.0 | I wish I was in a different situation. I wish it was a different outcome, you know? What are you specifically wishing for? Yeah, I wish I wasn't broken up, you know? If I'm gonna be completely transparent and honest, I wish I was just continuing to be in a relationship, if I'm gonna be honest, you know? I think that's the wrong wish. |
| 1:31.3 | All right, what's up, everyone? |
| 1:32.9 | Hey, lovers. |
... |
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