S1 Ep78: John Branyan - Vampires, Balloons and Christmas

The Tim Hawkins Podcast

Comedy, Religion & Spirituality, Improv, Christianity

4.7 • 2.3K Ratings

🗓️ 30 November 2017

⏱️ 86 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

John Branyan is BACK, and it’s time to get weird! This week, Tim counts people’s items in the express lane. Freight has an amazing Costco strategy. John is old enough to get away with petty crimes. Tim offends Jewish Vampires. And Caleb gets very upset when Freight eats his bison burger.

Also on this episode: Tim’s elbow is filling up with water. Heather doesn’t put groceries in a bag. The gang thinks Freight should have his own parade balloon, and subsequently, a calendar. And John gets served an original, hand-crafted Freightback.Follow us @poddybreak
Email us at [email protected]
Click here to see Tim LIVE!!!

Get more of John at johnbranyan.com
Tweet John @john_branyan

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Transcript

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0:00.0	But your headset's on.
0:10.9	We're talking.
0:11.9	It's part of the show.
0:13.9	Oh, put your headset on.
0:17.1	Did we start?
0:18.1	I've been recording for three minutes.
0:19.4	Oh.
0:20.4	You want me to back it up?
0:21.4	You know, he's over 50, so he's allowed people that age.
0:24.6	You're over the way with that.
0:25.8	Like Frates joke.
0:27.3	He didn't know he said it.
0:28.3	I didn't know.
0:29.3	Where is that cut off?
0:31.0	Is it over 50?
0:32.0	I feel like it's got to be higher than that.
0:34.3	He leaves the grocery store and gets in and anybody's car and drives home.
0:37.9	It's like, he says anything.
0:39.7	Whether he paid for it or not.
0:41.5	No, that's not a problem.
0:42.5	He just didn't know.
0:43.5	They look at me and they assume I just don't know anything.
	...

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