Ladies and gentlemen, Brad Cruz.

I'm going to be doing Los Angeles Phil.

Once again, welcome one and all.

We try to join hearts and minds and find some sort of solace

and being together while the whole world crumbles around us.

And we're going to forget about all that tonight.

This is going to be like Joe Fuckin' Gray and Cabaret.

So life is disappointing. Forget it.

And here life is beautiful.

The orchestra is beautiful.

Even the kittens are beautiful.

I've just seen something on my little desk here

that I had not noticed up until this point.

Someone snuck up and gave this to me.

I've been, of course, circulating through the crowd as I always do

with a simple laying on of hands.

There's many afflicted who come to my show.

And I try to cure them with a brush from my uvula.

And if I can harsh down on someone with my healing breath

or maybe brush someone's brow in a conducive way to health.

Because I'm all about health.

A small child came to the show a couple of months ago.

...