An entitled jerk demands that I move my car as he claims that the public parking spot that I parked in

was actually specifically reserved for him and his stupid Porsche. But after I ignored this man and

decided to go about my day, he decided to try and block my car in its spot by putting down

orange traffic cones to block my exit, claiming that he would call the police and have me

arrested if I move them.

So, I decided to get revenge by running them over and destroying them as I left. Here's what happened.

Okay, so there's a cafe in my city that is a favorite spot for car enthusiasts. There's a sort of

small car museum attached, and it's midway along a slow but scenic winding road. It's a great

destination for car

enthusiasts, as well as cyclists and residents of the upscale neighborhood that it's in. There are

about 30 parking spots and it's usually pretty busy. On the way back from a long drive,

I pulled into the U-shaped drive alley, and luckily there was an empty spot right in front of the

cafe doors. So I pulled in. And as I was

getting out of the car, a newer turbo Cabria pulled up right behind me and put on its flashers.

And for car enthusiasts, it was a black 997 automatic with a very large Porsche decal

across the top of the windscreen, plus red Porsche decals on the door handles. The driver bliped the horn

twice and motioned at me with his hands. I looked around thinking maybe I missed a handicap sign

or pavement marking, but I didn't see anything around me. So I walked around the back of my car

to check the pavement for the blue square, but nope, it was definitely a regular spot. As I was looking

under the car, the door of the Porsche opened up, and a heavyset man with a thumb-shaped head and a circle beard and mustache, extricated himself and said,

Sorry, bud, you're in my spot, you got to move.

I said to him, excuse me, and I looked around again, maybe thinking that this was reserved for staff, or maybe that this was the owner.

...