You're actually not going to feel like this forever. It can't be. It cannot be. There is just no way. You are going to get better.

Hey, it's Matthew here. Welcome back to Love Life. Short episode for you today. I wanted to share a clip of a conversation that I had with my brother, Stephen, because it resonated with so many people who heard these.

These two simple words that I share for getting over heartbreak. Check it out.

When you first have the moment of a breakup, it's like your, you have to shock and all the tears and the moment where it happens and it's kind of this shocking, dramatic moment.

And then it's kind of like that bit in the dark night where Bruce Wayne is thrown into that pit, you know, that prison with the big circular prison and up somewhere is the light.

But you are just stuck in this dark hole and you have no idea how you're going to climb out of it.

What's your initial thought on when you're faced with that kind of black hole you're in? What do you think people's, what's kind of your first instinct with your wisdom and experience now of when that moment happens?

This terrible feeling you have right now about losing this person. They're the love of my life. I'm never going to get over this. I'm going to miss them like this forever.

When I see them with someone else, I'm going to have a full breakdown. I'm never going to meet anyone like them again. Emotions change. They just don't stay the same.

And that, that you can, that much you can rely on. You're actually not going to feel like this forever. It can't be. It cannot be.

There is just no way. You are going to get better. And your emotions about this situation are going to change. Your feelings towards this person are going to change. They're not going to stay the same.

Your feelings towards other people are going to change. Someone else is going to come on your radar. And they're going to be interesting. And you'll like something else about them or love something else about them. And so everything will all change. None of this is going to stay the way that it is right now.

So those two words, if nothing else, if you're at the worst moment of your breakup, if nothing else, just remember emotions change.

You're absolutely right. You have to have like a degree of faith and, and well, it's rational as well, but it's a rational understanding of this pain cannot. This isn't going to be my life. People don't just stay in this shock forever. But I think it's so important as well that you engage in a procedure of emotional.

For lack of a less cliché word, self care, like you have to start that you have to put yourself on the right path to not prolong it. You know, you've got a wound. And now you've got to start applying the right antiseptic, the right bombs, annoyments, wrap the wound. You kind of have to do the right things now.

Do you have to go, okay, I'm going to start building the ladder of self esteem again. I'm going to stop turn self hatred into self love. I'm going to start treating myself like someone I care about. And if I was just looking at this person from the outside, I would be like, okay, let's just get you out for a walk today.

Let's get you to go and have a chat to a friend who brings you a bit of joy or someone who you know, like makes you laugh a bit. And just like gently, like do a phone call, do one phone call.

And I think these things, if you just start that little upward spiral, you can, you know, things start to get a bit better each day.

I agree. You know, the word gently is kind of interesting because there's certain parts of it. You're just not going to outrun. Like when you're truly heartbroken, you're not just going to like gym your way out of that.

Do you know what I mean? You're not just going to nights with friends out your way out of that. You're not going to party through it until.

Yeah, or even, you know, self help your way out of it through, you know, it's listening to so many podcasts in a day or a week or whatever.

You, those things are things that realign your focus. They build other muscles. You know, it's, we've talked before about it.

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