REPLAY: Killionaire TV 1: Joe v Lexi

The Worst Idea Of All Time

Tim Batt

Comedy

4.9 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 22 March 2026

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Welcome to the first episode of Killionaire TV. An exciting new fundraising and elimination project created by the people, for the people, in the interest of making the very same people, as wealthy as each other.

In our first episode Lexi joins us from Ireland to pitch us about an artificial intelligence torture chamber with Mark Zuckerberg’s name all over it. We then hear from Joe in Nottingham, who proposes assuming commercial ownership of the Amazon rainforest and harvesting the power of the monkeys contained therein, to show Jeff Bezos the time of his life.

Thanks to editor AJ of Cult Popture and graphic designer Tomas Cottle.

Support the boys on their modern-day adventures at twioat.substack.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Tim here, if you want to see me in the flesh and you're in New Zealand or Australia, good news.
0:04.6	I'm coming to Adelaide, Brisbane, Melbourne, Sydney, Auckland and Wellington for the comedy festivals.
0:12.1	Please buy some tickets now at timbat.com.com.
0:16.5	He's Timbat. I'm Guy Montgomery. And this, well, this is a dumpster.
0:21.0	Together, we're best known for watching bad movies too often.
0:24.9	But as the world turns to custard, we got a new thing going on.
0:28.6	We want to create the world's first ever trillionaire
0:31.5	and then swiftly remove the world's first ever trillionaire,
0:34.9	dispersing their funds to humanity at large.
0:37.6	We're taking your ideas, pitching them against each other until we find Juan
0:42.0	Winner.
0:43.1	Welcome to Killianier.
0:52.1	Hi, it's Tim and Guy here.
0:58.8	Hi, Lexi. Hello. Hi, Joe. Nice to see you both.
1:01.8	Hello. I feel underdressed. You feel underdressed?
1:14.3	A bit, yeah, you didn't say you guys would be turn up in suits. Yeah, this won't be apparent on the final product, but Joe's internet is is complete horse shit and it's very hard to understand what he's saying right now lexie can you concur with that or is that our end i i just think
1:19.6	i just think it's another advantage and i will take everything i can get where are you joining us from
1:25.2	ireland ireland sunny ireland home of the irish and uh Where are you joining us from? Ireland. Ireland.
1:28.4	Sunny Ireland.
1:29.7	Home of the Irish.
1:34.6	And how are you on this fine Irish day, night, evening?
1:35.4	I'm doing great.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Tim Batt, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Tim Batt and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.